Big Canvas, Baby Strokes

Snowballs,

I have a desire to tell you about.  It’s strong, potent, and lifelong. I desire to buy a chateau in Southern France and outfit it to become “The Seduction House”, a divine shelter for seductresses like you and me to be in our natural habitat. Imagine with me…

“…sleeping in a cozy, antique four-poster bed under fresh, white, luxury linens as the morning sun streams in through your windows, and a lavender breeze tickles you awake. You drape a dressing gown over your shoulders and pad down to the formal dining room. Under grand, rustic chandeliers you dine among some of the most passionate, creative, interesting, openhearted women you will ever meet.
 
During the day we have charm school lessons in the parlor where guest teachers come from all around the world to reveal their secrets of living a seductive, sensual, pleasure-based life.  In the late afternoon we ride bikes down to the sparkling sea and swim naked in that same water that inspired the art of Picasso, Monet and Van Gogh.
 
In the evening we are entertained by artists, singers, dancers, fire performers and burlesque queens in the basement that has been renovated into a grand theater.  And at night, we merrily gather around the huge living room fireplace in fluffy robes to close out the day with a fragrant cup of tea and a smooth nightcap.”

I so look forward to the day our first guests pull into the gravel driveway lined with topiaries, their eyes widening with delight. But that day is not today my loves. In fact, today just happens to be one of those days where I feel like The Anti-Seduction. And the only thing worse than feeling like The Anti-Seduction is knowing you have all the tools to get back to  your right mind, but absolutely no motivation to use them.

When our desires feel as far off and uncertain as The New World to an early explorer, how do we keep the wind in our sails?

Four Words: Big Canvas, Baby Strokes.

When I was a kid I was obsessed with the Pointillism. Pointillism is a technique of painting in which small, distinct dots of color are applied in patterns to form an image. In the quest to create The Seduction House, it feels like I want to make big, broad strokes and go much faster than what my current expertise and resources are ready for. But the true seduction of a deeply held desire is much more subtle; it is a long game, made of several small strokes all put together. Think of all the the footsteps that go into running a marathon, or all the touch strokes that lead to a mind-bending orgasm.  One big move won’t get you hardly anywhere, but savoring every step and feeling every stroke most certainly will.

What coins are you throwing in the fountain of your desires these days my loves? I always love to hear from you in the comments.  And, if you know any French real estate agents….{wink}

Je T’aime,

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Mother Mary, Summer Hats, Tassels & Tea. In other words, swoon with me!

swoon july

 

Love buttons,

I just returned from an amazing week in Mexico at the Astrotwins’ Become Your Own Astrologer Retreat (dates for 2017 now open, check them out!).  What a week! I’m feeling rosy from the sun, delirious from the giggles, and full to the brim with goodness to share – cue the April edition of Swoon! Swoon is a semi-monthly feature where I spill the beans on all my most recent favorite things.  I hope you enjoy!


Photo Apr 13, 5 19 39 PM 1. “Out of the ash I rise with my red hair and I eat men like air”, is just one of 40 completely bad-ass sentiments by Sylvia Plath, curated here.

2. Tea and tassels – a winning combo.

3. I just ordered a fresh deck of these epic Mother Mary Oracle Cards for the upcoming Eve’s Redemption Seduction Retreat.  Every reading with them is like sitting down with the Goddess herself.  HIGHLY recommended!

Photo Apr 13, 5 21 09 PM

4. Brain is the new ass. Like if you agree!

5. Stop the F*cking PRESS! There is now a Miss Fisher Coloring Book! Miss Phryne Fisher is my ICON.  No one exemplifies Sacred Seduction in action like this woman! I’ve watched every episode twice and I advise you to do the same!

6. As a devoted wearer of the hollywood red lipstick shade Ruby Woo by Mac, I’ve found a new hot-pink lover that I can’t keep off my lips.  “All Fired Up”, is a muted, matte fuchsia perfect for spring!

Photo Apr 13, 5 23 08 PM7. Really interesting piece on monogamy, hooking up, fulfillment and satisfaction.  Charlotte Shane writes: “It doesn’t take long to realize that having lots of sex is not synonymous with sexual satisfaction, and even sexual satiation is not synonymous with joy or larger fulfillment.” What do you think?

8. HELLO Spring Statement Shoe!

Photo Apr 13, 5 22 22 PM9. This white quartz mobile  will add a seductive, earthy, bohemian vibe to your space.

10. Ever scramble for topics to talk about on a date? Not anymore!

11. “The only romantic thing left in life is a hat.” Mimi Weddell. This straw cloche is my summer go to.

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“Getting The Spark Back” FOR REAL

Low angle view of lit firework sparkler against night sky

One of the most common questions I get asked by my clients is how to bring the spark back to a long term relationship. If you google “get the spark back” you will find a thousand and one answers to that question. “Act as if you have just started dating again, buy flowers, make eye contact over dinner, invest in some fuzzy handcuffs, etc.”

These things are fabulous instigators for spark, but let’s get clear about something: they are SYMPTOM based solutions.  It’s kind of like dieting.  There is no lack of education in our culture about how to lose weight, and yet, the diet industry continues to grow by leaps and bounds each year because despite all this information, the body is not something that can be controlled like a basil plant in your kitchen.  It is wild and alive with ever changing appetites that are governed by more than just refueling.  Celebration, self soothing, unplanned events and other factors are natural forces that turn the tides of our cravings, which is why calculated systems for controlling your appetites almost never work.

If you’ve been in class with me before, you know that I don’t teach pick up lines or anything else related to the traditional paradigm of seduction, at least not at the start. What I do teach is how to listen to the true longings of your heart.  I will teach you how to live openly, honestly, and with bold authenticity. There is nothing, and I mean NOTHING more sexy than feeling seen, heard, and DESIRED by your partner for being exactly who you are. That kind of relationship does not lack for spark, and that is exactly the type of relationship I want for you.

I may not teach how to get the spark back in the traditional way, but I do know how to light a fire inside you, and my signature program, Sacred Seduction Deep Dive, which starts Monday, is a seven-week intensive to do just that. In Deep Dive I will teach you how to be a powerful, sovereign, juicy, sassy woman. I will teach you how to be true to yourself no matter what.  A woman like that is a seduction powerhouse.  When you own every part of your truth you don’t need pick up lines, because you will have returned to your instincts.

Saturday is the last day to enroll.  To say yes to your spark, say yes to your truth, and say yes to yourself, click here and join us.

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Swagger, Seduction, and Smiles

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Last night I was at a yoga class and the teacher read a poem about “the practice of smiling.” It was about the idea that adding smiling to whatever you are doing will increase your sense of joy. It sounds honorable enough, but it actually made me really sad. Can you imagine telling a little kid they need to practice their smiling? I bet they would burst into a huge smile and laugh on the spot! But that’s what happens when we grow up isn’t it? We train the instincts out of a kid, so that even smiling becomes systematic and goal oriented. BLECH.

Question for you:

Instead of, or in addition to, bringing smiling as a practice to the shit you hate, WHAT IF you just did less of the shit you hate??

I know it is not always that simple, but that is why Sacred Seduction® exists – to give you a road map, compass and a support team as you navigate what truly seduces your heart, and begin to design your life around just that.  It makes me think of one of my clients named Tina. When I met Tina she was a little corporate worker mouse, seriously frayed around the edges. Married to her job and to her abusive boss’s approval, she hadn’t slept through the night in years.

In one of our sessions, Tina said a friend had told her what she needed to learn was “swagger”, and asked me if I could teach it to her.  I said yes, if she was willing to do anything to get it.  She agreed, and so I gave her the assignment to embarrass herself five times over the next week. As a type A person, this was her worst nightmare, but it gave her a lot to think about.  I told her that swagger isn’t really something you can learn, it is only something you can cultivate, and I wished her luck.

Tina was no stranger to living outside her comfort zone. She was incredibly successful at her career but had gotten there by giving her literal blood, sweat and tears (lot’s and lots of them).  Now, it was time to activate a new circle outside her comfort zone. Rather than doing, she was pressed to just be.  Rather than telling her body and mind what to do, it was time now to listen.

And listen she did.  A month later she quit her job, moved to Italy to work on a farm for a month, and fulfilled a lifelong dream of starting her own health and wellness business. Upon giving notice, her boss said some mean things to try to curse and prevent her success, most likely because he was so sad to lose her and so threatened by her independence. It rolled off her back like an olive off a Tuscan tree.   Now, Tina cannot stop smiling. She wakes up in the morning rested and refreshed after a good night’s sleep.  “Ease” has become her middle name.   Still pressing outside her comfort zone, she just completed her first speaking gig to a group of 350 people about wellness in the workplace. She looked out over the audience of tired eyes and spoke to them from the perspective of someone who had been there once, and owned that stage with total swagger.

Tina is a shining example of what happens when we tap into seduction as a positive force in our life, rather than dismissing it as a negative. She has built her life based around what seduces her soul, and let me tell you – this girl Cannot. Stop. SMILING

Natural, instinctive, smiling from the inside out – this is what I want for you and every woman, and that is exactly why I created my signature program Sacred Seduction Deep Dive, which begins Monday.  If genuine swagger is something you want, but the traditional approaches to get it have not worked for you, come to me my darlings.  Let me teach you everything I know.  Your life will look drastically different after a program like Deep Dive, and it is a sight that I guarantee will make you smile BIG.

Cheeeeese,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

 

 

P.S. – Uncertain if Deep Dive is right for you? Click here to send me an email. There is nothing I love more than connecting, and helping you make wise, empowered decisions that feel good to you.  Let’s Talk!

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Being A Sensual Woman Is Easier Than You Think

Sexy Fig

Recently I was speaking with a client who is currently in graduate school and hella stressed out.  We were discussing how to bring more sensuality into the current construct of her life which, like the shape of a book, is quite linear and hard around the edges at the moment. She shared that she has tried on her own to live with more sensuality, but it never quite seems to stick.

“You know Kitty, I own the lingerie, and I know I’m supposed to have nights where I eat figs and cheese off of silver platters and watch old movies in a dressing gown” she said, “but I just feel silly doing it, like it’s not me.  I think deep down I just don’t believe that I am a sensual woman.”

I told her I could relate, but she didn’t believe me.

“You’re such a sensual woman though! Lingerie and figs is like, what you do!” she said.

That’s true. AND, I can also remember a time when lingerie and figs felt about as natural as doing a headstand on a moving subway train.

Do you ever feel like your body, your wardrobe, or your vernacular needs to be different in order to become a sensual woman?

Well, let’s test that theory.

Take a moment to raise your right hand to your left forearm, and give it a little caress.

Did you feel that?

Well there you go. You’re a sensual woman. Welcome to the club. {wink}

See, sensuality is nothing more and nothing less than an experience of the senses. The lingerie, the lip gloss, the figs, the wine goblet, these things are not the source of your sensual power, they are expressions of the sensual power that already lives within you.

“Can it really be that easy?”  my darling client asked.

“It can” I replied, “if you are willing to make the simple shift of claiming that you already are a sensual woman, rather than going along with the idea that you need to become a sensual woman.”

A SENSUAL WOMAN IS NOT WHAT YOU BECOMEclick the image to tweet!

I mean, have you ever seen a baby with a teething ring, or ridden down a snowy hill on a sled when you were five years old, or rubbed a dandelion on your skin just to see the bright yellow color it would leave behind? Don’t you dare try to tell me we are not born with all the sensuality we will ever need.

You may think that time and cultural conditioning have trained the sensuality right out of you. But not so my loves.  Not by a long shot.  The awareness of your sensual nature may have been tampered with, but your actual sensual nature is eternal, unbreakable, un-train-outable.

It is the deepest part of you, your literal flesh and bone.

It is the part that speaks without words and think without thoughts.
It is always there, waiting for even the slightest acknowledgment from you, so it can serve you everything you desire.

This process simple, but not always easy.  If you feel like sensuality is not something that comes easily to you, please don’t let this round of Sacred Seduction® Deep Dive pass you by.  This course will take you to the depths of your sensual truth.

I want to teach you about the crystal ball in your pocket that shines with a 100% accuracy rate, how sensuality can make you more productive at work, and more wise, grounded and present in your family life. You see, sensuality is holistic.  There is no part of your life  it does not already affect. This ship has already set sail. Now, let’s give you the power of a compass.

Love,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

 

 

 

Today is the last day to take advantage of the Early Sign Up Savings – click here for all the details.

P.S. – feeling like you want to become a member of Deep Dive but have questions about whether or not it’s right for you? Click here to book a free 20-minute one-on-one with yours truly.

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The Absolute Key To Sustainable Self Care

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Many people see me as being a self care maven, but the truth is, my relationship to self care has always been a slippery slope. Don’t get me wrong, compared to ten years ago, today my life is a veritable spa.  But I find that with all the opinions about what good self care is, and all the Instagram quotes preaching about filling my vessel before I give to others, I quickly short circuit and just want to throw up my hands about the whole thing.

How I’ve learned to navigate around this, and any frustration really, is through this quote by Louis Schwartzberg:

“Beauty and seduction are nature’s tools for survival, for we protect what we fall in love with.”

Recently I took a fabulous class in Mayan Abdominal Self Care Massage.  During one portion of the class I fell asleep massaging my belly.  I awoke with a start to the sound of new age music and a soft spoken meditation.  I suppose I should have felt relaxed and rejuvenated, but in that moment I felt acutely irritated.  When class ended I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.  I drove home with a serious furrow in my brow feeling confused and angry, but couldn’t pinpoint the reason.

Then the raunchy, hard rock song “Stroke Me” by Billy Squier came on the radio.  I started to laugh, imagining all of us doing the belly massage to this song instead of the archangel-harp-spa-music.  My heart lightened.  I realized that there was an essential element to sustaining my self care that was being neglected: making things sexy.

It made me think of when my Mom was in the hospital a few weeks ago, and she was refusing to drink a shot of aloe vera juice for her tummy, even though it was necessary for her to feel better.  Rather than rolling my eyes and insisting, I turned on the song Sweet Home Alabama, pretended we were at a college frat party and shouted “Chug! Chug! Chug!” until she was laughing so hard she couldn’t help but take the shot.

Humor, sexiness, pleasure, romance, fun…these are NECESSARY NUTRIENTS to sustain any sort of practice. And for that reason I say with absolute certainty: Seduction is the key to sustainability. (click to tweet!)

QUOTE.KEY TO SUSTAINABILITY

 

For some people it is enough to get up in the morning and grab their dry body brush just because it supports the lymphatic system.  I think that’s great.  For me, that little sucker needs to be on a silver platter sprinkled with some enchanting essential oils while Maria Callas belts out arias at wake the neighbors volume.  As I brush, I need to check out my ass in the mirror with “you are so hot” attention and finish with a little spank.  Seduction is about enjoying the whole process, not just the end result.

If this truth resonates with you, darlings, listen up! My signature program Sacred Seduction® Deep Dive opens for enrollment this Thursday, March 10th.  Deep Dive gives you an extensive library of knowledge in how to live a seduction based life, but in addition, I go in deep with you through one-on-one and group coaching to give you all the personal attention you need.  It is my favorite program to teach, I look forward to it all year.  What would it feel like to have that enthusiasm poured all over you to transform your life through romance, seduction and fun, rather than hard work?

If you’re answer is: it would feel f*cking fabulous, don’t wait another minute. Click here!

Lovin’ and Rubbin’,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

 

 

 

Image: Howl Collective

 

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The 5 Essential Tools For Genuine Confidence (VIDEO)

click to play!

In all my years of coaching women in how to be confident, self-trusting, sovereign individuals, there is one universal road block that always comes up without fail. 

 It’s the P. word, loves.

Not personality. Not even perfection.

It’s POWER.

Most people are more terrified of power than they are of spiders and bad hair days combined. Why?

There are very few models that show us how to utilize our power without the use of aggression, bullying or force.

Aggression and force are so last year.

You want a different kind of power.

You want the kind of power that comes from true confidence, not puffing up your chest to try to scare the competition.

The kind that comes from attraction and authenticity over having an agenda.

You want to use flirtation over force. Magnetism over manipulation.

Sacred Seduction IS this different kind of power.

It’s is not a power comes from shouting, it is a power that comes from getting really quiet, and truly listening.

It is the power of brazen honesty over bullying.

It is the power of invitation over cloying insistence.

And…it…changes…EVERYTHING.

I know this power well.  I’ve dedicated my life to researching it, modeling it, living it and teaching it – and I want to share everything I know with you.

That is why I have created a fun, free game to teach you the five most essential tools to building genuine confidence and living in this new paradigm of power.

Click here to join us, and the first game will be delivered directly to your inbox.

WARNING!

As a result of playing this game…

  • You will walk with more swagger.
  • You will feel comfortable holding eye contact for a longer period of time. 
  • You will feel more comfortable being sassy, and you may surprise yourself and/or those around you.
  • You will speak up with more ease.
  • People will comment on your mysterious glow.

This is the natural resting state when you say yes to being a sacred seductress. 

What say you darling?

GO ON GIRL, SAY YES.

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Do you feel awkward when trying to be sexy?

i-will-seduce-you-with-my-awkwardness
Raise your hand if you’ve ever had this experience: Your anniversary is coming up and you’d like to do something  romantic to surprise your partner.  Maybe it’s lingerie, a striptease, or making a beautiful meal together by candlelight while listening to sexy music.  You feel a bit cheesy and nervous when you hear the door open, signaling that your partner is home.  He or she walks into the kitchen where Maxwell is throbbing through the airwaves and you are wearing a see-through robe.  With trepidation in his/her eyes, you get a look from them wondering “what’s up?”.  You suddenly feel vulnerable and bashful, maybe even resentful, because secretly you feel they should be the one planning romance for you.

Or maybe you are single, and while out at a bar, you see someone you are attracted to.  You wish you had the confidence to just go and strike up a conversation, but the mere thought makes you feel like there is a handkerchief stuffed down your throat.

Can you relate? Uh-huh.

You are not alone.  In a culture that sexualizes women around every corner, yet runs from a woman’s true, wild, uninhibited sexuality like onlookers at the Hindenburg crash, it is not uncommon to experience a monumental mind f*ck when expressing your sensual power.  You may feel competent or even really good about expressing your sensuality alone and or/with girlfriends, but throw a romantic interest into the mix and let the dance of cat’s cradle begin.

I remember wearing a thong for my boyfriend once, the first one I had worn in my life.   I think I actually said out loud to him “I’m wearing a thong” in a monotone voice with my eyes frozen like a deer in headlights.  He looked at me as if to say “Um…Okay.”  It was so uncommon for me to wear lingerie at the time that I didn’t feel I could just parade into the bedroom wearing nothing but hot pink butt floss, and yet drawing attention to it felt so embarrassing! (Sigh, cue the retroactive self-compassion.)

These days I wear lingerie like it’s my second skin.  Slips, French bras, silk panties, booty shorts – you name it.  I wear it with confidence and verve. What led to this tectonic shift in confidence?

Three letters babe.  N.B.D.

Translation: No Big Deal.

I realized that if I wanted to make it seem like it was no big deal to be wearing lingerie, I had to make it feel like it was no big deal FOR ME.  So I got a professional fitting and dropped $350 on the beginnings of my lingerie wardrobe.  I tossed out everything I had ever bought from Target, and created a gorgeous drawer full of sachets and lining paper to make beautiful home for my new investment.  Because pleasure begets pleasure (click to tweet), once I started having fun, everything changed.  I was beginning to understand what it meant to experience seduction not just as a technique but as a lifestyle.

The moral of the story is this: when you do something sexy solely for the benefit of another person, it emits the foul stench of agenda.  When you make something your own, it becomes yours to share. When you know how to own it, you can take it with you everywhere.

JULIE.ROLLERSIf an immersion in the seduction lifestyle is something your soul is craving, check out the 2016 New Orleans Seduction Retreat. This retreat features private lingerie styling sessions, burlesque classes, lessons in the sensual arts, and a powerful tribe of seduction sisters with whom to develop your craft.  There are only two spaces left.  Click here to check out a video of last year’s NOLA adventure, and if it calls to you –  pick up!

Please know that every one of your efforts to reclaim your inherent Seductive Way takes great bravery that shall not go unrewarded.  And whether you feel as smooth as the Mack Mama, or clumsy as Mary Katherine Gallagher, I bow at your feet.

Courage darlings.  You’ve got this.

Love,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Romance As A Nutrient

Recently I was talking with a client about her current lack of desire for sex.  I asked her if she thought there was anything her husband could do to help increase her level of desire. “Well yeah there’s a lot he could do. He could compliment me throughout the day, grab my ass, buy me flowers, kiss me for no reason….” the list went on.

I could so relate to this, and I bet you can too. Sometimes romance seems frivolous or unnecessary, but in my years of research both personally and professionally, I have come to know this one thing for sure: romance is an essential nutrient to the feminine soul. 

Last night for example, I was lying naked in my lover’s arms.  My body was shimmering as warm candlelight reflected off the golden oil I had just massaged into my skin. I felt Buena Vista Social Club  pressing its signature sound against my body like hot, steamy Cuban air.  As my lover looked at me, he told me I looked like a movie star. I felt like a fucking movie star. I have had so many moments in my life that are just teeming with magic and beauty, and I owe it all to my insistence upon romance. It would have been very easy to skip lighting the candles out of fear of looking cheesy, or ignore the craving for make-out music that had been tugging at the hem of my dress. But romance is like oxygen to me – I just breathe more deeply when it’s around.

When I think of the top ten most romantic moments of my life, yes there was that epic countdown kiss on New Years. There was that boat ride under the willows in Central Park.  There was that time I dressed up like a living pin up and drifted around the city with my lover who was clad with a camera, sharing a flask of Jameson and photo documenting our love affair as artist and muse.

(Pauses to catch breath.)

But what about the Sunday  picnic I went on with my mom, where we brought Champagne and art supplies and spent the day painting trees as their leaves danced in the sun? Or the time I made a major screw up at work and bought myself a $75 bottle of Champagne to celebrate never having to make that mistake again? I remember when I used to work in 9-5, I made a commitment that every Wednesday I’d take myself out on a romantic lunch date. I would go to a fancy restaurant and order a glass of wine.  I’d bring my favorite book and leave my phone at the office.  Lingering over three full courses was a far cry from choking down a salad at my desk like every other day.  I found that I would often leave some food behind on the plate, simply because I was so full from slowing down to feel. Romance can be so nutritious.

Click to tweet!

Often we resist romance because we think we don’t have time for it, or we fear that our partner will find our efforts are silly or stupid.  That is why learning how to romance yourself is essential to living a lifestyle of seduction.  We cannot teach others what we do not know ourselves. In Betty Dodson’s book Sex For One, she talks about how when we are asked about our first sexual experience, we often recall the first time we experienced intercourse.  But actually, our first sexual experience happens long before that, when we first start exploring our bodies as little kids.  Her point is that the erotic relationship we have with ourselves is a completely separate entity from the relationships we share with others, and I couldn’t agree more.

Today, I urge you to take this ancient alchemist we call romance and pour it onto your life like ganache on a layer cake.  What would woo you today? Remember, every woman’s taste for romance is different.  If flowers and chocolate make you want to hurl, get creative.  What is on your romance wish list?  Tell me in the comments darling, tell me everything.

Forever Swooning,

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My Real Thoughts On God’s Timing

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Recently one of my darling students (who goes by A.) wrote to me about the concept of Divine Timing, the idea that everything in the universe is happening in harmony even when it seems like anything but.  She asked:

“I know you said sacred seductresses trust in divine timing.  How exactly do you get to that trust relationship as a sacred seductress? How do you even know divine timing can be trusted? Where does that knowing come from?”

Such a great question. But who am I to talk to you about divine timing? Well, I”m a human, so no one.  And everyone.  So here we go.

The period where my relationship to divine timing was most tested was the year 2014. That was the year I ended an 11 year relationship with my now ex-husband, and my father passed away in a bicycle accident. Both events happened very suddenly.  Every day that year when trolling Instagram I would see inspirational quotes about how ‘darkness gives way to light’ and ‘sorrow gives birth to joy,’ etc., etc. Frankly, I wanted to take every one of those quotes, stack them on top of each other, light them on fire and ride a motorcycle over the blaze.  The mere concept of divine timing felt trite and condescending at best, and like something I wanted to pee on at worst.

I don’t necessarily believe that everything happens for a reason, but I do believe that reason can be found in everything.  From my vantage point now, two years later, it’s not that I’m happy that those things happened. But the fire of the universe’s kiln has cooled enough that I am finally able to see and touch my smooth, shiny new shape. I wouldn’t have chosen those things for myself, and yet (warning: inspirational quote ahead), I am grateful for how all that pain hollowed out my heart, and opened me to loving more robustly than I ever would have been able to before.

Personally, I like to think of the Divine as being an avant garde fashion designer like Alexander McQueen. His creations evoked an edgy, almost grotesque type of beauty, and yet it was a beauty that changed the world with its innovation. Because we are humans, we think we want the designer of our lives to be a bit more like Banana Republic – predictable, neat, symmetrical.  But really, who would you want dressing you at the end of the day?

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When something is not going my way and I need a reminder of divine timing, I always look to nature. Talk about the Queen of Fashion Week!  When I look out my window and see a brilliantly red autumn leaf, hanging on by a thread and about to take one final walk down the runway of it’s life, I am so reassured by it’s beauty. Some force out there, bigger and smarter than me, was able to create that.  I couldn’t create something like that with all the sharpies, chemistry sets and magic potions in the world.  There is an effortless genius in that leaf.  And when I take a moment to remember, I realize that that same effortless genius is what created me, and what continues to create me,  throb after throb after throb in the heartbeat of life.

So, my darling A., brilliant woman who asked this question, I offer you no answer because I don’t think an answer is actually what you are looking for in the first place.  You are looking to become more comfortable with the fact that there actually is no answer.  As my Dad used to say when I would pester him with questions about religious myths when I was a child “it’s a mystery, you’re not supposed to figure it out.”  Anything you can think of these days, the internet can bring to you.  Any question you have, Siri will answer for you.  Let’s enjoy the mystery, A.

THE VERY ESSENCE OF ROMANCE IS UNCERTAINTY.QUOTE

For example, today when I was getting coffee I noticed there was a poem posted on the wall above the milk and sugar station.  I was so moved by this poem and I wanted to take a picture of it so I could remember it, google the author, and share it with you all.  But my phone was in the car, so I had to let it go.  I stared at the words, drinking in the way they moved me, and I left with only that delicious mystery in my heart. Which really, is so much more satisfying than an image in my phone.

As Oscar Wilde once said “the very essence of romance is uncertainty.” (click to tweet!) And let’s be honest darlings, that’s exactly how we like it.

Yours In Seduction,

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P.S. – My brand new course Beauty Queen, is off to a roaring start.  I am so excited to welcome so many beautiful souls into the sanctum of Glamour Church! Want to join us and make your beauty ritual empowered, educated, inspired, and most of all, fun as f*ck?

CLICK HERE TO GRAB YOUR SPOT NOW – Class begins Jan. 30th!

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Photos: Scarf dance by Alexander McQueen and Damien Hirst

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