Lace Leggings, Venus Astrology, and Antici…pation. September Swoon Is Here!

 

SWOON

 

Hello Turtle Dove!

Autumn is almost on the air! Except here in New Orleans, where the heat is as fierce as ever.  I’m writing to you from my annual New Orleans Seduction Retreat, happily anticipating 12 hot babes who have all been waiting over a YEAR for this experience.  Wowza! I can’t wait.

I’m so happy to present you with this month’s gallery galore, Swoon! Swoon is a monthly feature of all things, words, people and ideas that are currently seducing the pants off of me.

Enjoy, savor, and let me know your favorite things in the comments!

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  • This pin, this pin, this pin, this pin, this pin.  Meow.
  • I love this project by Lonely Lingerie called “Lonely Girls“. It’s not the most diverse body showcase in the world, but hey, a belly roll in the hand is worth two in the bush! (Isn’t that what they say?)
  • Violet Gordon Woodhouse is one of my favorite historical seduction storie.  She was one of the most legendary musicians of her time, and was a champion of love and seduction.  Check out this article on the woman described as having “a sense of personality that made people feel they were in the audience of somebody special, a presence that demanded attention, devotion and adulation.  Her music was the expression of her personality.  She was a Queen.”

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Four Husbands & She’s Not Stopping There

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Dear Seductress,

Today, I want to talk to you about something beyond just the art of seduction.  I want to talk to you about surrender.

Although, when we really look at it, is there a difference between the two?

As Albert Camus once brilliantly said “I don’t seduce, I surrender.”

When I think about some of my icons of seduction, they just also happen to be women who know how to surrender like a boss.

I think of Josephine Baker, who left the U.S. and her entire family behind to move to Paris, because the discrimination she faced at home prohibited her from becoming the legend she knew she was born to be.

I bet it was hella scary for her to get on that boat and cross the pond into the wild unknown.

But she surrendered anyway to the vibrant, eccentric, unstoppable force that she was, and followed it’s legendary lead.

I think about women like Violet Gordon-Woodhouse, who during the ultra conservative Edwardian era fell in love with four different men at the same time.

But rather than stick to social convention and just choose one, she bought a giant mansion and maintained deep love affairs with all of them under one roof, their undying love for her being the clay between the bricks of what held them all together.

The original seductresses were champions in the game of love.

But the difference is: being successful in love was never their original intention.

It was a by-product of saying yes to whatever buck ’em bronco ride following their deepest truth may have had in store.

It’s the surrender that brings the sexy.

There are at least 100 women in my life who I feel fit this profile.

And they are all alumni of my signature program Sacred Seduction® Deep Dive which closes for enrollment this Friday.

When I asked the alumni what they got from the program, the most resounding answer was this:

“I learned how to trust myself.”

Trusting yourself: the key to unshakeable confidence.

Trusting yourself: the key to feeling sexy no matter what the circumstances.

Trusting yourself:  the only way to make the right decision 100% of the time.

Trusting yourself.

So simple, but so not easy.

Effort on the other hand: super easy.

But effort can only get you so far.

At a certain point, working hard to transform or improve yourself becomes unsustainable, and it’s time to look within for a deeper reservoir from which to source your confidence and wisdom.

And that is exactly why I created Deep Dive. To give you the support you need to pull back the layers on the jewel of authenticity that lives inside you.

The part that requires no effort to shine.

Only deep, uninhibited surrender.

Because I know that the parts of you that lay most hidden are the parts most deserving of the spotlight.

And it’s time to bring them out, center stage, where they belong.
Ready to be brave? I know you are.

The moment you sign up is the moment the transformation begins.

ENROLLMENT CLOSES  FRIDAY.

Let’s make this happen.

Click here, let’s meet at your place.

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How To Talk About Farting And Still Be Sexy

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I love the tradition of going around a circle on a person’s birthday, each friend sharing something they love about the birthday girl/boy.  Last night at my own birthday dinner, my wonderful friends spoiled me with words so decadent, it felt like eating macaroons and drinking champagne at the top of the Eiffel Tower.

One friend said “You are the only person I know who can wear a sequin bombshell dress and talk about farting to a room full of people at a party, and still be enchanting.”

We all laughed…because it’s so TRUE.

I talk about farting alot because I fart alot.  And I think it’s really funny! I have the kind of farts that are loud and proud and sound like a duck during mating season.  It’s truly hilarious.

You don’t have to talk about farting at a party in order to be sexy. (How’s that for a seduction tip?)

But you do have to be true to who you are.  No matter how eccentric that may be.

There is this assumption that in order to be “in the feminine” you have to be soft, and slow.

But soft and slow is just one facet of the feminine experience.

There is also the side that is lusty and fast.

The side that is nurturing, caring and maternal.

The side that is goofy and adorably awkward.

There is the side that is wise, and protects your tender heart.

And then there is the side that can be downright reckless with it.

ALL OF THESE SIDES OF YOU ARE SEXY.

To edit any of them out would be like taking the beads right out of a kaleidoscope, leaving you with an experience that is placid, flaccid, and boring.

Sacred Seduction® is the opposite of boring.

It is the holistic face of the feminine. Alive. Instinctual. An almost savage truth. And it is downright irresistible to those who can handle it’s power.

In Sacred Seduction® Deep Dive, my signature program that closes for enrollment this Friday, there are very few traditional seduction techniques that I teach.

Because listen, if seduction were just about push-up bras and pick up lines we’d all be doing it.

Real seduction is a different kind of power than the one that comes from hiding behind a mask of perfection.

It is the power that comes from being brave enough to take the mask OFF.  And what it takes is some serious GUTS.

The mermaids of Deep Dive do alot more than just bring lovers to their knees.

They are the pioneers of what it means merge femininity and feminism together, once and for all.

If this kind of power speaks to you, click here.

I’ve got a seat saved for you, right next to me.

Let’s dive in.

P.S. – Unsure if Deep Dive is right for you, right now? Let’s talk.  Click here to schedule a free one-on-one. It would be my pleasure to talk to you in person, and help you figure out if Deep Dive is a fit.

 

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A Sensual Yoga Movement Ritual (VIDEO)

Do you ever find that in the game of self love, sometimes you are left chasing your tail?

Like, you know you’re supposed to love yourself, but then in moments where you don’t love yourself, you feel down on yourself for not loving yourself enough!

That is why it is so important to me that self-love be a PHYSICAL practice, as well as a mental and spiritual one.

After all, the distinguishing factor between a love affair and a friendship is it’s physicality – the desire to hug, kiss, caress, and snuggle.  Why should it be any different in your love affair with yourself?

Physical practices of self-love are something I am EXTREMELY passionate about.  That is why in my signature program Sacred Seduction® Deep Dive, every week there is a new collection of movement rituals and unique self-seduction practices.

That is also why I would like to share one with you today.  It is a 15-minute yoga based routine that you can do any time you want to slip into the sensation of self love.

I am thrilled to share it with you, and let me know what you think in the comments.  And, if the sensation of self love is something you feel like you could use a bit of a leg-up with, join us in Deep Dive.

In Deep Dive, the content and curriculum are intensive and profound.  But content is nothing without connection.  That is why I make myself available to the Deep Dive mermaids throughout the course with one-on-one coaching, group calls and daily interaction in the online community. I have got my eye on you 24/7.

I’ve always said, seduction takes a village.  Inhabiting the most authentic, brazen, sensual part of yourself – aka your seductress – is not meant to be done in isolation.  I would be so honored to count you as one of my mermaids.

With love and long hip circles,

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P.S. – Enrollment closes Friday September 16th! Click here for all the details. 

 

 

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How To Feel Sexy In Any Situation (Without Having To Buy New Underwear)

Hampton Inn Realness

Rocking some Hampton Inn realness

This weekend I attended a family wedding, and spent the night at a Hampton Inn.  I was on the phone with a girlfriend, and when she asked where I was, I told her I was laying on a pair of very over-bleached sheets.

“That doesn’t sound very sexy Kitty Cavalier” she said.

“Yes it does, because I’m in them,” I replied.

After a mutual giggle, it really made me think about how limiting our definition of the word sexy can be.

For example, I think a new set of Sharpie markers is extremely sexy.

I think the way the bubbles on top of a glass of champagne tickle my nose is sexy.

When I tell the truth, even when it’s really hard, I feel extremely sexy.

I even think the way Winnie’s fur feels after a bath is sexy!

Now let me clarify, when I say these things are sexy, I don’t mean that they make me want to fuck someone.

What I mean is that they engage my senses.  They make me feel passionate and excited.  They remind me of my own aliveness, which to me, is the most sexy thing of all.

I remember a time when I thought that in order to feel sexy I would have to lose 30 pounds, or drop a whole paycheck on new lingerie.

Or that I would have to memorize a bunch of snazzy pick up lines and master the art of potent eye contact.

Basically I thought I would have to become someone different than who I was.

And the mere notion of it all exhausted me.

But what I have found is that by switching my viewpoint from one of a magnifying glass to one of a kaleidoscope, sexy is available to me any time I want it.

And that is exactly what I want to share with you in my new free class, “How To Feel Sexy In Any Situation (Without Having To Buy New Underwear)”.

Trying to feel sexy from something outside yourself requires alot of work.

It can feel exhausting, like you just want to throw up your hands and forget the whole thing.

But when you can tap into the source of sexy, the feeling is almost effortless.

When you know how to find the source of sexy, you can come back to it again and again, in any situation.

This secret is not complicated.

It works for everyone, and it won’t cost you a thing.

Be my guest in this free class, and find out for yourself just how simple feeling sexy can be in any situation.

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How Do You Define A Seductress?

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How do you define a seductress?

Is she a man-eater? Manipulator? Vampiress?

Someone out to steal your lover when you aren’t looking?

I’d like to offer an upgrade on this definition.

A true seductress is…..

Wildly authentic.

Assertive and direct.

Unapologetically sensual.

Feminine as fuck.

Seduction is a power we are all using every single day, whether we like it or not.

Trying to pretend you are not a seductress, at least in some way, is like trying to pretend you don’t need air to breathe.

Every area of your life – work, home, family, love – benefits when you know how to use your seductive power responsibly.

The truth is, every woman alive is a natural seductress.

But not every woman alive is given the tools and support necessary to embrace this power and use it wisely.

That is why today, my signature program Sacred Seduction® Deep Dive opens for enrollment.  It is my most personal and intensive offering.

I truly believe that for a Sacred Seductress to unfold fully, it requires more than MP3’s and computer screens. It requires continuous support, coaching, and intimate connection.  Someone who really cares about you and has their attention on you full time.

That is truly what makes Deep Dive different.  It’s not only about the content, it’s about the connection.

Click here to learn more about becoming one of our mermaids!

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5 Things Every Woman Needs To Know

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Turtledoves,

We all know the saying “confidence comes from within”, but what does that mean exactly?

It is no secret that every day you receive subliminal messages that tell you when you lose more weight, or make more money, or buy new underwear that you will feel more confident.  (that last one does have a bit of truth to it.)

But there is also a new pressure, that if you could just become more evolved, more intuitive, more joyful, more playful, that you would have more confidence.

In my experience, confidence doesn’t come from stomping out your flaws with a shoe.

It’s the REVEAL, not the conceal, that counts.  

That is why Sacred Seduction® is defined as attraction through authenticity.  Confidence that comes from smoke and mirrors is like a house with no foundation.  It may look great from the outside, but take one step inside and you risk fall right into a black hole.

That is why I am thrilled to invite you to my free, 5-day game called “Start The Season With Seduction.”   This game will give you five concrete tools you can start using right now to feel unshakably confident.  When confidence comes from embodying who you are, rather than trying to be something you are not, no one and no thing can ever take it away from you.

I want every woman in the world to know that truth in her literal bones.  And that is why I have created this 5 day adventure.

Click here to sign up and join us now!

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The Unfortunate Truth About Genuine Confidence

LOUBITONSWhen I was 17 years old I hopelessly lacked confidence.  All I wanted was for people to like me, as most teenagers do.  I remember having a crush on a boy who was in a band, and he liked “alternative” looking girls.  I was kind of the Candice Bergen of my Catholic high school, always sporting a smart blazer with cigarette pants, occasionally venturing out with a signature polka dot mini skirt and mohair sweater.  

When a romance with the bass player in question kicked off, I decided it was time for an extreme makeover.  I grabbed my best friend Mary and we high tailed it to Salvation Army to stock up on vintage pieces to pair with my Express boot cut jeans, thereby making myself look more “alternatized”.

Alternatizing is just one example of many times I have tried to buy confidence in my life.  But what I find over and over, is that true confidence is rooted in….


You want to know what it is?

I must warn you.

It’s very un-sexy.

Are you sure you want to hear it?

You sure you want to take the red pill?

Okay…

If you insist….

True, genuine confidence actually comes from:

Humility.

UghhhhhhHHHHH!

 Really Kitty????

Couldn’t it be something just a FRACTION more fun, like sexy body language or charismatic conversation skills???

I know, I know. Humility. Très BORING!

But let’s take a closer look…

When I think of unquestioningly confident women, just a handful of the examples that come to mind are:

  • Michelle Obama
  • Mother Teresa
  • Eleanor Roosevelt
  • Colette
  • Amelia Earhart


What do these powerhouses all have in common?

A.) They stood for what they believed in more than they wanted people to like them.

B.) They took the risk of sharing their art, be it activism or aviation, on a global scale, even though to do so must have felt like having your skin ripped off and your flesh laid bare for all to see.

C.) Most of all, they wanted to connect more than they wanted to look cool. 

I’ve spent so much time in my life, like many of us, trying to look cool in order to feel confident.

You know what that Resting Bitch Face bought me?

A bunch of fucking wrinkles. 

Sacred Seduction® is actually founded on humility, because is Sacred Seduction® is defined as attraction though authenticity.  

An example from my own life: I’ve started attending a really challenging yoga class once a week.  When I say really challenging, I mean that every single person in there could probably toss a pizza with their bare feet during headstand. 

 And then there is little old me, so PROUD I can finally flip my downward dog into a Wild Thing Pose.  When I first started attending, the temptation to power through stone faced, pretending I’m not on the verge of tearing my bicep muscles with each chaturanga was there profoundly. 

But instead, I chose to offer smiles to every one of those lean, mean, yoga machines when I walked in the room.  Very few of them ever smile back, but I don’t care.  In choosing to connect rather than compete, I am free to enjoy the class on my own terms, one sweet knees-chest-chin at a time.

Humility is the freedom of walking into a bar and feeling more interested in the people and things my eyes are resting on, than in how many eyes are resting on me.

It’s rocking grungy flip flops at a barn dance party in the middle of nowhere, just as hard as you would rock red and black heart-toe Loubitons (OMG) on the mahogany floor of The Rainbow Room.

These things are so simple, and yet, so not easy. 

Hence, why seduction is truly a spiritual practice.

And humility is the ultimate seductive sweet spot. (click to tweet!)

It means you have nothing to prove, and by virtue, it proves that you must be pretty fucking cool.

SPOTLIGHT ONTO YOU MY TREASURES:

What does humility mean to you? Can the words seductive and humility co-exist in the same sentence? Do tell in the comments.   I hang on your every word. 

Wild Thing, I Think I Love You,

 

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A LITERAL LOVE POTION IN YOUR VERY OWN HANDS

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Hello Scrumptious Soul,  

Last night I was up late putting the finishing touches on the Beauty Queen course, which begins tomorrow.  The piece I was working was the routine for self-massage.  I am so fucking passionate about the physical practice of self-love, and and I want to share something very special with you from the workbook:

Imagine how much more peaceful this world would be if all of us received daily massage. Massage lowers the heart rate, rejuvenates the mind, reduces depression, increases mental clarity, increases circulation, moves stagnant energy, reduces stress, decreases cortisol, increases serotonin and so much more. Sounds like someone you’d want to go on a date with, yes?  

Self- massage has all of these same benefits, PLUS it fosters a deep, intimate, physical form of self-love.  Loving your body is not just a mental state, it is a physical experience.  Have you ever had a moment of holding hands with someone and on a biological level you feel yourself bonding? That is because there is a hormonal cascade of oxytocin, the hormone of devotion, love and bonding, being released ecstatically into your blood stream. In nursing homes when dogs are brought in to visit the patients, it creates an improvement in their overall health. Babies who are born prematurely gain weight faster when they are held and massaged. It’s like like a literal love potion in your very own hands.

The same exact process happens when we perform self- massage. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING compares to getting in there, squeezing, touching, caressing, and dragging my fingernails across my own skin.  It is literal love made flesh.  After all, when you love someone, the first thing you do when you see them is give them a hug. Why would the rules of loving yourself be any different?

And that’s really it right there.  My mission with Sacred Seduction® is to create a feminine spiritual practice that is fun, fulfilling and DEAD SEXY.  Self-care can be so BORING sometimes, my God! What if self-care was a total turn on? What if you felt a flutter an the bottom of your heart when thinking about your self-love practices, the same kind you feel when you are about to kiss someone?

I have spent my entire life trying to heal the relationship with my body by changing the thoughts of my mind.  Read that sentence one more time.  Body.  Mind.  Wouldn’t it have made more sense to include my actual body in the equation, rather than just dwell in the wounds between my ears?

The female body has been desecrated and robbed of it’s divinity for the last 5,000 years. Isn’t that long enough? Beauty is how we return to reverence. It is how we take back the power of the feminine, i.e. the power of CREATION, and allow that creative power to show proudly on the inside AND the outside. It has absolutely nothing to do with how you look to another person (except for the fact that the more art there is in the world, the more calm and peaceful we become.) Take for example this excerpt from a blog I wrote about an experience I had just moments after my father had died:

In that somber and swollen moment just after his spirit had left his body, it naturally felt like some sort of prayer was in order, however I don’t really pray with words.  I find them cumbersome and complicating in moments such as these. Personally, I pray with beauty.

I took a yellow rose I had brought from home and peeled off the petals one by one. Each petal was a prayer of love, a tangible tribute to his physical form. I then took an essential oil blend called “release”, and I anointed his forehead, followed by the bottoms his feet, symbolizing my prayer for him to have a smooth transition, and letting him know he was free.

Beauty takes moments that could be riddled with and darkness, and miraculously, it lets in the light.  Without beauty, this memory could have been a trauma in itself-. But because of beauty, I will always remember my Dad’s body in that tender moment, shining as beautifully as a bright yellow rose.

Adorning, polishing, tending and honoring the temple of your soul.  

THAT is what it means to be a Beauty Queen.

We start tomorrow, and I would be honored to have you as part of this royal assembly. Join us now! 

 

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“Excuse Me, Would You Help Me Find My Clothes?” I said.

FLOWER BATH

One night, I went swimming under a moon so bright you would swear it was dawn at 12am. I was naked in the warm ocean surrounded by friends. On the beach was a crowd of about 100 people, all getting high off the vibrant moonlight. As I emerged from the waves like a mermaid, I saw this really hot guy. So I walked straight up to him (me naked, him fully clothed) and said:

“Excuse me, I can’t seem to find my clothes. Would you be so kind as to help me look?”

(SIDE NOTE: I knew exactly where my clothes were the whole time.)

After making that brazen move I felt more radiant than ever before in my life. Not because of how I looked, but because of how I felt. It is what I deem to be True Beauty.

You know, the kind of beauty that happens when you take a risk and your cheeks flush. Or when a friend hears you are sick and brings you flowers, which are beautiful to begin with, but when laden with love are downright sacrosanct.

But that’s not really the way we approach beauty in our culture. In fact, our understanding of the joy it can bring to our lives has been whittled down to the width of a razor. These fucked up beliefs about beauty hold us back in ways we don’t even comprehend. They limit our power, joy, pleasure, creativity and confidence.

It makes you want to throw your hands up and abandon the beauty industry all together. But don’t throw your false lashes on a bonfire just yet, my love.

A simple shift of perspective can change everything.

For example, think of how many times in your life you have mindlessly put on lipstick. What if lipstick was a prayer of tribute to that which shapes the expression of your truth through words – i.e. your lips? What if applying the color red was not just about making your lips pop, but about the fact that red is the only adornment befitting of these portals of your power and passion?

I once had a boyfriend who said to me “I usually don’t like makeup on women. But it’s not the makeup on you that is beautiful, it’s the look on your face when you wear it.”

This was a grand compliment. It let me know he was seeing more than my prettiness, he was seeing my ART.

There is an artist in all of us.  But for most of us that artist is hidden and starving.

It’s time for that to change RIGHT  NOW.

In the Beauty Queen course, which starts this weekend, I teach you all the “rules” of a great beauty ritual; how to draw straight eyeliner, whether or not eye creams are worth the money,  how to do a complete at-home spa like a professional, etc. But it’s not the rules that interest me. 

It’s breaking the rules that really turns me on, and I want to give you the education and permission that will make your creativity SOAR.

Your ritual should be one of joy, fun, delight, creativity and EMPOWERMENT.

After all, you do it every single day of your life.

Together, let’s put the power of  beauty back where it belongs, in your own hands.

Enrollment closes in just a few days, the time is now.

Click here and join us!

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PS – Want a taste of Beauty Queen and how it can change your life? Click here to sign up for my free class “Eyeliner As A Means To Enlightenment” before it’s gone!

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