Recently I was in line at the drugstore and I saw a headline that made my eyes grow wide and my heart grow full. On the cover of Us magazine was a photograph of The Bachelor, (as in, the TV show), but THIS time, the headline read a bit differently:
“She just didn’t feel it.”
I swear I almost threw my armful of Swisspers and Cadbury eggs in the air, grabbed the guy behind me and doe-see-doe while screaming “She just didn’t feel it!! She just didn’t feel it!! She! Just! Didn’t! Feel! It!”
Let me be clear, I wish no ill will towards the bachelor himself. But to me there is no clearer demonstration of all the twisted ideas we have about seduction than on this show. A cookie-cutter assembly of 25 women groomed solely to please the male gaze are selected to live together in what is essentially an ivory tower, wait for Prince Charming to call, and when he does, be ready to fight to the death against other women to get his attention.
It is like a demented Disney movie nightmare come to life.
In order to be a considered seductive, most women feel they have to be able to hook a man (or a woman) like a rake. If she is able to make that person fall in love with her, her seductive power is proven. If she can’t, her seductive power is diminished.
But there is one crucial decimal point missing in this equation:
What if she just doesn’t feel it?
This experience of seduction being a feeling we can surrender to, rather than a manipulation to be executed, is exactly what makes seduction a spiritual practice. It requires that a woman shift the focus from what she can seduce, to finding out what and who is seducing her. Once you’ve got that road map, you’ve got it all.
In my upcoming 12-week course Deep Dive, there is a curriculum piece about mythical stories, fairy tales and archetypes and what they have to teach us about our womanhood. What brings me elation about this Bachelor story is that it proves we are writing a new fairy tale - where the princess is already awake. She is a woman initiated. She is connected to her instincts. She follows the golden rule:
In Deep Dive there is a reason we call the members of the course Mermaids. A sacred seductress has mastery in the art of going with the flow. She knows how to both surf the squalls and laze about in the tide pools. Her body is made of 80% water, just like the earth itself. There is no point in fighting the tides of desire. Desire, like the all of nature, is cyclical. That is where a seductress gets her confidence. Not from controlling what others think, but from surrendering to the cycles of her truth (in style, of course).
So tell me gorgeous, what is seducing you today? Use the tag #seduceme on Instagram and show me what’s got you under it’s spell.
With a flick and swish of my mermaid tail,
P.S. – Feeling like you wouldn’t know what’s seducing you even if it bit you on the bum? I’ve got you covered. This Friday I am teaching a free online event: Seduction Under Any Circumstances. I will teach you how to connect with your inner seductress no matter what might be happening on the outer, and let her take the lead. Just say yes.