How did the rose ever open its heart?

rose into the sun

One of the questions I am most frequently asked by my clients is: “How can I make my life more of a seduction? One where I wake up and everything has a magic to it, rather than just the droll of my to-do list and every day tasks?”

It’s a great question, an eternal question. One that’s been around since before we learned how to chop wood and carry water. The thing is, a life of seduction is not about waking up to bon-bons and bunny slippers any more than it is putting on a suit to work a 16 hour day.  Either of those things would bore you to tears in time.

Seduction is both yin and yang, masculine and feminine, the heat of the fire and the structure that contains it. So rather than reaching for extremes, we follow the golden rule of creating a seductive life: we make art with what we have.

As an example, I’d like to tell you the story of how I moved out of New York City this winter, and onto a new adventure of living in the South:

The month of February 2015 was like one long going away party.

I remember being showered with fragranced rose petals as a circle of soul sisters whispered the words “farewell Kitty” in a magical ritual.

I remember tracing my fingertips across every square inch of the walls of my empty apartment whispering “thank you, thank you, thank you”.

I nuzzled my nose into the neck of a man who smelled like cedar and looked like James Dean, moving slowly across a dance floor while a hot jazz band crooned out St. James Infirmary.

I drank gallons of rose petal tea with my roxy-star assistant, laughing uproariously to the sound of Jack White’s guitar mixed with the screech of packing tape stretching across box after box.

I remember the street grate steam that once felt like a nuisance, now becoming my swirling good-bye kiss. The hustle and bustle that had grown to drive me crazy over the last few years, I now realized was just the city doing what it does best: showing me tough love like a parent shows a child, knowing all along that I was capable of so much more than I thought, and taking me to task.

I gave myself permission to buy a pack of Parliaments and lean out my kitchen window like a teenager, blowing smoke into the freezing cold air. (Sue me.)

Lot’s of people bought me drinks. Lot’s of people bought me tea. Lot’s of people bought me dinners.

Lot’s of angels came out of the woodwork to give me that one last hug.

The day of my move, as the seconds counted down to my 3pm departure, my dear friends Lauren, Fabiola, Vivi and Stephanie descended on my home like Flora, Fauna and Meriwether. Suddenly, all the last minute stressors like sweeping dust bunnies, disposing of the last haul of throw-aways, what to do with the god damn effing cable box, etc. were taken out of my hands like a screaming baby, happy to now be in the arms of doting Aunties.

Once all that was done, we had one long, luxurious hour to savor each other, do a despacho gratitude ceremony and order a pizza. Fabiola opened the ceremony with this poem by Hafiz:

Did the rose
Ever open its heart

And give to this world
All its

It felt the encouragement of light,
Against its
We all remain

I love this poem so much. If you ever want to see a seductive life in action, plant a rose bush and watch it grow. For it is this continual encouragement of the light against our being and our willingness to open to it’s embrace that gives us the wisdom, intelligence and inspiration to pick up the turnkey that turns the mundane into the magical: making art with what we have.

Now, your turn…

Tell me in the comments, how have you made art out of life recently? I read every one of your replies, because I need your stories just like you need mine. Seduction takes a village, and we are all in this together.

It’s the beauty that we’ll remember,
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Photos: Fotothing, Saveur Vegetale, Audrey Hepburn for Vogue

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New Monthly Feature: SWOON!

Swoon by Kitty Cavalier

My Darling Doves,

After Deep Dive launched last week I have given myself the most seductive gift of all: down time.  In that down time I have come across a myriad of things I am itching to share with you. This happens to me often, so rather than just dropping links here and there, I’ve decided to make this a new monthly feature called (what else?) – SWOON!

I hope you enjoy this dreamy digest of May delights.

SWOON_1Fuck That! A Manifesto – a must read by the formidable and fabulous Gala Darling.

The Public Library. Remember those? I do my best work in libraries.  I’m writing to you from one right now. And I just scored Goldie Hawn’s autobiography for a sweet summer read.  Go visit yours, even if it’s just to smell the books!

You Are Loved box set by my personal aromatherapy muse, Julie Wray at Olivine. Add this to my Christmas List, Birthday List, Easter List, President’s Day List….

SWOON_2She’s preggers! Congrats and love to my dear friend Kate Northrup.  I love how in this post she perfectly models how to savor the arrival of a dream.

I’m always skeptical about Simon and Garfunkel covers after growing up on those songs and holding them so dear, but this performance by First Aid Kit on David Letterman brought a tear to my eye.  Also, the intro by Dave is adorable.

I’m obsessed with White Fir essential oil mixed with Lavender these days.  I got introduced to it by my new massage therapist.  (Who is so talented that I now plan my finances as every $100 being a potential “Jennifer Unit”.)

Phyllis Sues teaches us all the meaning of seduction, and just might be the one to tip the scales and get me to try tango for real.  (That move at 3:00, swoon indeed!)

13 Witchcraft and Magic Museums To Visit, yes please, and thank you very much.

Another dreamy post by Gala Darling featuring a gorgeous video of our week at the Astrotwins retreat in Tulum.  It makes me miss my girls like crazy. (One word: SPONGY!)

What do you find oh-so-swoonable these days? Tell me in the comments!

Fluffing my fainting couch,
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What makes me qualified to be your teacher? (Last Day To Enroll In Deep Dive)

IMG_0145Turtle Doves,

Today is the final day to enroll in Deep Dive, my 12-week gem of a course in living as a sacred seductress. I’ve put a ton of work into this program, a lifetime really. I’ve often shared about how in Deep Dive you are my number one priority. But you might be wondering, why would make  you want to be my priority?

Well, I could list my accolades for you.

  • That I am a burlesque dancer that has seduced literally thousands of people all across the country with my wily ways.
  • That for four years I was the enrollment director of a school that teaches women how to design their lives around their pleasure, and received a deep initiation into the feminine and pleasure as a way of life.
  • That I am not just a dancer of Qoya, not just a Qoya teacher, but am a Qoya teacher trainer and a very proud ambassadress of the Qoya lifestyle.
  • That I’ve invested tens of thousands of dollars in my own personal growth education.
  • That I’ve walked the labyrinth of growing up wanting to be a nun, then evolved into the picture of female insecurity, and then pulled myself up by my garter straps to become the confident, embodied, full-time seductress I am proud to be today.
  • That I was once featured (editorially) in Penthouse magazine.
  • That my Mom is really proud of me.
  • And so is my Dad.

These are all important pieces of my credibility. But what makes me most qualified to be your teacher?

I am a woman who walks her talk.

The thing I am most proud of in myself, the best compliment anyone can give me is “Kitty you are so real.” If you read my blog you know I write straight from my heart. If you’ve worked with me you know I will go to any lengths to make sure you march confidently towards living your seductive legend,  shocking even yourself with how amazing you can be. If you’ve heard me speak you know that every piece of wisdom I share comes straight from my life experience. I believe that as a teacher, practicing what you preach is everything.  I believe in my willingness and ability to do just that, but more importantly – I believe in you.

I believe in your ability to turn heads when you enter a room. I believe in your ability to speak your mind no matter what people might think. I believe in the innocence of your seductive nature, and your ability to own it. I believe in your beauty. I believe in your intuition always steering you right. I believe in your ability to leave your lover wide eyed and mouth agape at the rapture-in-the-flesh they just witnessed; even if that rapture was simply you touching up your lipstick. I believe in your ability to hear the word “ no” and take it as a challenge rather than a rejection. I believe that everything you ever need to feel seductive is already there inside of you. And it’s time we wake that Sleeping Beauty up.  


The reason I am sharing all of this with you, is because I know that there are some of you out there with your tap shoes on, dancing around the decision of whether you are in or out. And so, as your prospective teacher I will offer you some advice on the spot. Listen to me and what I have written here. Listen to the women who have taken the program, and their stories listed below. And then, and most importantly, listen to yourself.

With the air electrified from Beltane yesterday and the full moon on the horizon tomorrow, I really can’t think of a more auspicious time to embark on such a journey of sensuality, growth, sisterhood and daring adventure. Enrollment closes tonight at 10pm EST, and we begin class tomorrow with a full moon group ritual.

I would relish the opportunity to teach you what I know, learn from you in turn, and kick up our heels over the next 12 weeks. All it takes is three little letters…




Like A Mermaid In Heat,
k swirl signature


“People started to tell me I looked different yet it wasn’t external. It was the magnetism and confidence of my seduction. Kitty helped me recognize my seductress and identify the rubble to be cleared so that I can shine and become a great attractor. If you’re considering working with Kitty, the answer is Hell Yeah!!!”

– Lulu Lerner

“In Deep Dive, each exercise helped me examine myself on a deeper level with a kind and gentle eye. The group coaching calls were fun and so helpful. Kitty is wise beyond words and can make anything fun. Deep Dive changed my perspective. I don’t look as things as black or white, right or wrong. My lens has softened and has opened up to so many possibilities for new beauty right in front of my eyes. Deep Dive was a beautiful gift.”

— Christina Reale

“Kitty is a gifted Spiritual Seductress. Allow her to take you by the hand and show you the world, and you will view it with fresh and awakened senses. She meets you where you are at and will take you as far as you’re willing to go. One of the many things I learned being coached by Kitty is learning to overcome my resistances by working with them rather than against them. If you are ready to explore and nourish your innate sensuality, to deepen your creativity, to cultivate your intuition and generally roll with the ebb and flow of life with ease and playfully – Deep Dive with her!”

— Ruth Znotins

“Sacred Seduction taught me that I no longer need to shrink down if my authenticity makes others uncomfortable. Instead I present myself to the world vibrantly, and let the world shape itself around me.”

–Nikki Garrett

Sacred Seduction has taught me how to feel good in my own skin. I now live with the unshakeable truth that I am the bee’s knees – with all my flaws, mistakes, goofiness and awkward stumbles. I finally trust myself. I have put down the heavy bag of self-loathing and walk with a swagger that tells me that I love myself.”

–Jill Lacina

“Since studying Sacred Seduction I feel happier and more able to receive and attract good experiences and people into my world. I have also made friends with some truly amazing, friendly women who are a joy to be around.”

–Laurel Carpenter

Ready to jump in?

Click here to join us in Deep Dive!



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Pleasure Marketing Vs. Pain Marketing

pink envelope

Back in my days of being a corporate trainer, I remember hearing this statistic: a person is ten times more likely to buy something that will decrease pain than they are something that will increase pleasure.

How I discovered seduction as a spiritual practice was a multifaceted dance. But one of the places that was my absolute training ground was managing the sales department of a very successful company.  When I first started out as a sales team member, I sucked. Hard. A cold call from me it was like talking to Piglet from Winnie the Pooh.  I was so nervous that I would hang up before you even had the chance to pick up the phone. Or I would spend hours on the phone listening to someone’s life story with no sale in sight, just because I was so grateful someone was talking to me.

Eventually, I had to toughen up and go deeper. I developed deep, personal, caring relationships with my clients. I started making sales through my genuine desire to see my clients grow, rather than just the need to make a quota. I am blessed that I had gifted teachers and coaches to guide me in that process.

The thing that surprised me about becoming savvy at sales is that by default I learned exactly how I could push someone’s buttons if I wanted to. I knew how to listen to someone’s concerns and create a desperate need where there wasn’t one before.  I knew how to pad their resistance and glide them along on a pink cloud, right on into a massive purchase if I wanted to.

But the point is that I didn’t.

One of the things I am most proud of is that after I left that career, both my clients and my team members reflected back to me the integrity they felt in my sales approach.  I never pushed, unless they were asking for a little mother bear nudge. I never manipulated. I stood strong in my belief in the product I was selling, I stood strong in my belief in the client themselves, and I left the results up to a power greater and wiser than the all three of those things combined. And during that time, our team proudly met and often exceeded every target that was set for us.

It seems like there is a lot of marketing out there that is designed to target our pain, make us hyper-aware of it, and then sell a product that provides the solution. Let’s be honest, it’s an approach that works. But let me make one thing clear: I am not interested in scaring you half to death about the progress of your life or lack thereof. I am not interested in making you feel like the Titanic is going down and my courses are the last life preserver on the ship. I care deeply about your pain, but not because I think I can take it away with my magic webinars.

I care about your pain because it is an integral part of what make you, you.  I want to hold your battle scars and perhaps still open wounds up to the light and admire their beauty. I want to touch the war paint on your face and show you the colors of my own. Your pain shows me that you are a woman initiated. You are a woman I can relate to, a woman I respect, and a woman I want to get to know.


One of the most treasured pieces of feedback I’ve gotten from my Deep Dive Alumni is that the class taught them how to truly approve of the way they are living their life, despite the attempts of the predatory ego to convince them otherwise. That they received the power to know and own that they are doing it right, even if they did something wrong. Ownership like that is some of the most potent power on earth.  If we could bottle that stuff, I believe we could heal a lot of pain. But that’s the thing; it can’t be bottled because it is alive.  It is wild, organic, untamed and undomesticated.  Just like seduction. Just like you and me.

So yes, here is a link to the Deep Dive program. And if you choose to join us, I would be thrilled. Because in Deep Dive, you are a member of my tribe and my seduction family, and seeing you take the reigns of your seductive power is my top priority. Every member of this program gets my full attention. It is my pleasure to give, and I know it would bring you more pleasure than you can imagine to receive.

Pleasure, Power and Purpose. These are the three pillars of what is means to live as a sacred seductress. They are the legs of the table, the points on the triangle, and the road map for living a seductive life.

Deep Dive closes for enrollment at 10pm Saturday night. The golden invitation has been extended. I await your RSVP.

With the ecstatic tingle of anticipation,
k swirl signature





Want to take a peek behind the curtain of Deep Dive? Click here to watch the trailer.

A Deep Dive into the Art Of Sacred Seduction


Photo Source: Plenty of Colour

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The Seductress And The Stud

The Seductress And The Stud by Kitty CavalierOne Saturday morning not long ago, I awoke to the kiss of my lover telling me he was stepping out to get coffee. I told him to take a set of keys because I would probably walk the pooch while he was gone. About five minutes later there was a knock on my door. “He must have forgotten something,” I thought as I climbed out of bed in a see-through French lace slip and flung the front door wide open.

To my surprise, standing there was my neighbor Angela, arm in arm with a complete stranger. “Oh hi!!!” she said. “My friend here is thinking of moving into the building, and since you’re moving out we were wondering if she could take a look at your place?”

“Come on in!” I exclaimed with genuine enthusiasm, and proceeded to give them a grand tour of the apartment from top to bottom, not bothering to throw on a robe. After the tour, I realized I had never shared my book with Angela so I gifted her a copy as I was showing them out. When I opened the door, there stood my fella, coffee and orange juice in hand. Angela looked at me, looked at my book, then looked back up at me and said:

“It sure seems like you know what you’re doing.” 

Later on while relaying this story to a friend, I caught myself saying the words: “I felt like a total stud!” Stud. Stud? The fact that “stud” was the first word to come to my lips was alarming at best, and stayed with me all day long.

A stud is defined as:

  1. a young man :especially one who is virile and promiscuous.
  2. a tough person
  3. a male animal kept for breeding

What is the female equivalent of a stud? Usually the first place our mind travels to is “slut”. But while being called a stud only bolsters a young mans confidence, being called a slut can wreck a young girls life. So what then, is the feminine nomenclature for this feeling of confidence, bravado, power, and most importantly – PRIDE in our erotic adventures and ongoing appeal?

I bet I don’t have to tell you that it starts with a “sed” and ends with an “uctress”.

The etymology of the word stud comes from the German word stān, which means: “to stand”. As a self-proclaimed vocabulary nerd-on-wheels, this thrills me to no end.

The Seductress and The Stud

I have spent my life researching, living, learning, modeling and teaching that the sacred seductress is the ultimate woman of empowerment. She is a woman with the world in the palm of her hand. But rather than using that power for domination and control, she employs it to bring more pleasure, power and purpose to herself and everyone around her. She uses charm over force, flirtation over confrontation, attraction over exertion, and receiving over achieving. Make no mistake – she has no fear of being the first to bite when that is the necessary action. She may have a dazzling manicure, but if she is pressed to fight what she believes in, you just might find blood under her fingernails.

For a sacred seductress, erotic escapades come from a place of deep consciousness and sovereign decision-making. Whether its a string of drunken, reckless one night stands or ecstatic, tantric howling sessions under a full moon, she owns it all. She refuses play into any bullshit shaming and blaming that the patriarchy, terrified of her immense and unpredictable erotic power, would throw her way. In other words:

A sacred seductress is a woman who knows how to STAND.

A Sacred Seductress is a woman who knows how to STAND. -Kitty Cavalier

In 1985 when Madonna’s career was just starting to reach epic proportions, a photographer sold nude photos of her to Penthouse and Playboy for $100,000. Industry experts and critics speculated that her career was absolutely over, that there was no way for her to recover from such a scandal.   What was her response to the photos?

“So What.”

Confidence is the key to unlocking our seductive power.  However, there are two different types of confidence – a.) the kind that comes from hiding your flaws and b.) the kind that comes from owning them. This second kind of ownership, the kind that is impenetrable and unshakeable, that comes from taking the mask off rather than painting one on is the cornerstone of Deep Dive, my 12 week program that starts this Sunday.

Deep Dive is like going to a gym, but rather than seeking to change or “improve you”, we work to make your round edges even curvier, your sharp points even more articulate, and most of all, to ensure that no matter what comes your way, your STAND stays towering and tall.

I would love to have you join us.

Beauty’s where you find it,
k swirl signature


Photo Source: Classy and Style, HB Mag and History In Pictures




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A Letter From My Mom, To You

mom and me

Dear Lovers,

If you have ever taken a class with me before, you probably know my amazing Mom, Geri.  My Mom is my best student and most loyal client.  She has taken every class, retreat and workshop I have ever offered.  Mom has not always been such a devoted seductress-in-training. I remember when I asked her to pull a Goddess oracle card a few years ago and she refused, feeling they were too “of the occult” for her taste.  When I first started performing burlesque, like any Mom would be, she was concerned and frightened about me “taking my clothes off for strangers.”  But when I started teaching seduction as a spiritual practice, that was when stars really started circling around her head.

Mom is proud graduate and returning student of Deep Dive, my 12-week program which starts May 4th. When talking about the program over coffee recently, she shared some of the details of her experience in Deep Dive, and as usually happens with my Mom, I was amazed.  I asked her if she would share these details with you.

 Here is her seduction story:

mom and me guest house


“When Kitty first started teaching Sacred Seduction I was not sure what to expect. I had watched her journey learning about the divine feminine, using goddess cards (which made me nervous at first), embracing powerful programs about pleasure and finding your hearts desires to performing and teaching Burlesque. I watched her go deeper into sisterhood, her feminine power and loving herself and her body. I was fascinated by her concept of “sacred” seduction even though I didn’t completely understand it. I could see her unfolding into a confident, secure, authentic woman. But when she decided to quit her successful well paying job and put her full attention into developing her innovative ideas and teaching her messages, I admit I had a lot of trepidation. But she sounded so grounded, sure of herself and believed in her message so wholeheartedly that I had to trust that she would make it work.

Kitty was quite creative and started with various programs, seminars, retreats and webinars. I attended most of them and was in awe of her ability (though I am somewhat biased) to coax the sensual power and beauty out of hiding in every woman who crossed her path. When she was a girl, Kitty would always love to play schoolteacher, making her dolls or family members into her students. I could see she had a gift. Now, to watch other women sit spellbound as Kitty weaved her seductive magic with ease and grace was fascinating. I was amazed at how comfortable she was in front of a group. I was actually learning from my daughter and having fun!

For me, the main draw was the word “sacred”, which seemed to conflict with the word “seduction”. I saw so many women coming out of their shells, or should I say going deeper into their real, authentic selves after practicing this way of life. It has been a profound experience to see the way that authenticity is actually seductive. After taking Kitty’s courses, I now know that seduction is not the least bit manipulative, nor is it about just being sexy.  It is about seeking out your own truth in every situation, using your feminine gift of intuition, following your heart and not being afraid to speak your truth to others. Now I can recognize myself as a sacred seductress, and for me this has been an affirmation of my worth and value as a woman.

The best part of Deep Dive and why I am taking the program again, is that it is so much more than just a “program”. The videos, assignments, games and curriculum are all wonderful and rich, but what truly makes it an experience is the connection and intimacy within the group. Watching the women transform and put the exercises into action inspires me and teaches me how to live sacred seduction more deeply and fully in my own life. 

The thing I am most grateful for in practicing Sacred Seduction is learning how to listen to my intuition, trust it, and follow it fearlessly.  This has been a priceless gift to receive. I am proud to call myself a mermaid of Deep Dive, and hope to swim the waters with you too!” 


Wow is the word MOM turned upside down.  Quite fitting don’t you think?

I am so incredibly blessed to have Geri as my Mom. I am also blessed to be living in her home for few months as I make my move to live in New Orleans.  One of the most treasured parts of living together is that every time a woman signs up for Deep Dive, Mom, Winnie and I turn on a rockin’ song, and dance wildly while adding her name to the enrollment list in celebration.  This is something I have done all along when someone joins my programs, but having Mom there to dance with me is a palpable magic, and something I will never forget.

Today is the last day to take advantage of the early sign up “Lover” savings of $150 off the tuition. We would be honored to dance you in.

With heart bursting love,
k swirl signature





Photos by :Beth Mayesh

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Playback, Workbook and Secret Surprise! (Will Self-Destruct In 48 Hours)

seduction under any circumstances workbook

Greetings Seductress!

I had so much rip-roaring fun with you at yesterday’s event – Seduction Under Any Circumstances. Thank you for all your deep questions and for contributing with your sassy comments in the chat box.

In case you missed it, I have posted the playback which will be available until Monday April 27th a 10pm EST.  I have also included a special bonus workbook to follow along with the seduction lesson.  You can access both by clicking here, and entering the password “mermaid”.

Also, I have decided to extend the Lover Savings on Deep Dive through Monday as well! So many brave and beautiful souls have signed up for this adventure and I want to make it as easy as possible for you to join us.  We start May 3rd with a special, online kick-off ritual and I would be honored to have you in the program!

Here’s to you, here’s to us, and here’s to Living The Seductive Life!

All My Love,

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Seduction Never Lies

seduction never lies 1Recently I was in line at the drugstore and I saw a headline that made my eyes grow wide and my heart grow full. On the cover of Us magazine was a photograph of The Bachelor, (as in, the TV show), but THIS time, the headline read a bit differently:

“She just didn’t feel it.”

I swear I almost threw my armful of Swisspers and Cadbury eggs in the air, grabbed the guy behind me and doe-see-doe while screaming “She just didn’t feel it!! She just didn’t feel it!! She! Just! Didn’t! Feel! It!”

Let me be clear, I wish no ill will towards the bachelor himself. But to me there is no clearer demonstration of all the twisted ideas we have about seduction than on this show. A cookie-cutter assembly of 25 women groomed solely to please the male gaze are selected to live together in what is essentially an ivory tower, wait for Prince Charming to call, and when he does, be ready to fight to the death against other women to get his attention.

It is like a demented Disney movie nightmare come to life.

In order to be a considered seductive, most women feel they have to be able to hook a man (or a woman) like a rake. If she is able to make that person fall in love with her, her seductive power is proven. If she can’t, her seductive power is diminished.

But there is one crucial decimal point missing in this equation:

What if she just doesn’t feel it?

This experience of seduction being a feeling we can surrender to, rather than a manipulation to be executed, is exactly what makes seduction a spiritual practice. It requires that a woman shift the focus from what she can seduce, to finding out what and who is seducing her. Once you’ve got that road map, you’ve got it all.

In my upcoming 12-week course Deep Dive, there is a curriculum piece about mythical stories, fairy tales and archetypes and what they have to teach us about our womanhood. What brings me elation about this Bachelor story is that it proves we are writing a new fairy tale – where the princess is already awake. She is a woman initiated. She is connected to her instincts. She follows the golden rule:


In Deep Dive there is a reason we call the members of the course  Mermaids.  A sacred seductress has mastery in the art of going with the flow.  She knows how to both surf the squalls and laze about in the tide pools.  Her body is made of 80% water, just like the earth itself. There is no point in fighting the tides of desire.  Desire, like the all of nature, is cyclical.  That is where a seductress gets her confidence.  Not from controlling what others think, but from surrendering to the cycles of her truth (in style, of course).

So tell me gorgeous, what is seducing you today? Use the tag #seduceme on Instagram and show me what’s got you under it’s spell.

With a flick and swish of my mermaid tail,

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P.S. – Feeling like you wouldn’t know what’s seducing you even if it bit you on the bum? I’ve got you covered. This Friday I am teaching a free online event: Seduction Under Any Circumstances. I will teach you how to connect with your inner seductress no matter what might be happening on the outer, and let her take the lead. Just say yes.

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Seduction Under Any Circumstances – FREE ONLINE EVENT

seduction under any circumstancesRecently, I was doing a little field research on Facebook, and I posted this question to my community: “What is the number one question you have about living a seductive life?”

Here are some of the responses:

  • How do you keep your juicy sparkle when you’re feeling low?
  • How do you feel safe enough to live a seductive life? I’ll go along merrily, and then I’ll encounter something REALLY creepy, and shut down.
  • How to get in touch with fun and sexiness when you are too tired or sad
  • I can be a once in a while seductress – but how do I become an all-the-time seductress?
  • Where/How to make it current reality instead of “looking” to be a Seductress in “the future”?

I am so grateful for your answers.

And I noticed a very common thread.  Every single answer was the same, with different wording. The real question is:

How do we stay seductive when the going gets tough?

You may have moments where you are flirting with some beautiful stranger, you’re dressed up for work or a dinner party, or you are walking through a garden at the height of a sensual spring day and you think: “Yes, I am a seductress.”

But then there are moments when you sit on the couch watching TV with a bag of tortilla chips that don’t even taste good, and there is a crusted dollop of baby food on your shirt that you are starting to smell the odor of chicken and peas emanating from and you think: “Seductive rigamortous has set in.”

Or maybe you just got text-ghosted by some bozo who loved you and left you, or you went on what you swear will be the last crappy OK cupid date of your life, or you look at your tired weary eyes in the mirror just before leaving a 10 hour day of work and you think: “Where the hell did my seductress vaporize to this time?”

You got questions? You got questions?? Well girls, I got answers.

The thing is, there is no blanket, all encompassing answer. Seduction is personal, individual. And while our challenges are the same, the solution is different for everyone.  This is why, on Friday April 24th I am hosting a free event called:

“What the hell is a seductive life anyway? – And how do you live one when you haven’t brushed your teeth yet, your manicure is chipped and you work at a job you hate?”

(Just kidding. I thought the title was catchy, but written out in big letters it looks a little off-brand.)

So, the real title of the event is….(drumroll)

seduction under any circumstances

In this 60-minute online event we will cut to the chase with powerful content right from the start. I am going to give you six tangible tips to call upon your inner seductress anytime, like she is a fairy godmother at your beck and call. Then, we are going to dive into some deep Q and A, because that is where the magic really unfurls. Click here to reserve your spot.

As the character John Brooks once said in the movie “Little Women”:

“Over the mysteries of female life there lies a veil, best left undisturbed.”

I invite you to sneak past the veil and come on backstage darlin’.  I’ve got a spot on the fainting couch waiting just for you.

Viva La Seduccion!

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Forgetting To Be Miserable

photo(25)This is a picture of me after working out at the gym yesterday.

WOW! YOU WORKED OUT TODAY KITTY! CONGRATULATIONS! Here are three massive red geraniums to celebrate you!

Can you imagine if the world worked that way? If every step we took towards self-care, caring for others, striving to run our own little universes resulted in a brass band parade, the corking of champagne, or the delivery of a bouquet of flowers?

It’s almost like we would forget to be miserable.

The unfortunate thing is, the world doesn’t work that way currently, (except for maybe in New Orleans, which is exactly why I’m moving there.)  Just turn on the local or national news and there you have about five hundred good reasons to just want to crawl into a hole and stay there for eternity.

But the thing is, by virtue of the fact that you have gotten this far in reading this post, I know you won’t settle for that. Because you are a sacred seductress.

A sacred seductress shapes the world around herself, rather than shaping herself around the world.  (Click to tweet!) She is sassy, feisty, flirtatious and would not hesitate to strike up the band just because she finished a day of work, ran for 20 minutes on the treadmill, made a great dinner, or because her poor constipated dog finally had a really good poop. (okay, that one maybe just me).  She is committed to the discipline of celebrating, savoring and high-fiving. She sucks the marrow from the bone of life with a big, loud, slurp;  and follows that with an even bigger, louder moan of pleasure.  And because of these things, she glows.

In Deep Dive, my upcoming 12-week course in living as a sacred seductress, we practice celebration with the same tenacity and vigor as a professional sports team.  We actually have celebration drills.  It is a practice we call “push-ups”. It is when another woman does or says something you think deserves celebration, you give her a push up, lifting her up even higher than she can see for herself, and in doing so, both of your celebration muscles get toned and tightened.  It is high intensity training in celebrating the little things.  This discipline does not just change us personally as individuals, it changes us collectively as a class, and in turn, has the opportunity to change the whole world.

Want to go for a swim?

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