The Best (And Most Unlikely) Seduction Movies

Darling Seductress,

I am writing to you from the parlor of a 150 year old mansion in New Orleans. Very soon Stanley, the sweetest little buttered biscuit of a taxi driver, will be taking me to the airport.  I just completed a heavenly week of our annual Seduction Retreat and my heart is positively sparkling.  I’m a bit tired, but sparkling just the same.

Last night after all the guests departed I was seeking some serious comfort, so I curled up in bed with a hot water bottle, lavender oil, and one of my favorite “woobie movies.” A Woobie Movie is a movie you can watch over and over again and it always brings a warmth to your heart, like a security blanket. Most of my personal woobie movies are also some of my favorite seduction films, though you won’t find any 9 1/2 weeks or Basic Instinct on this list. (Films that only tend to showcase the shadow side of seduction don’t really tickle my fancy.)

The films I’ve chosen for today’s list are movies that illustrate the art of Sacred Seduction. All of them have strong female leads with a palpable sense of sovereignty. These women live life on their own terms, tethered to their ever-evolving truth, and in doing so, they become irresistibly attractive to everything and everyone around them.

Let’s get this party started:

vienne Chocolat

This movie is a truffle in itself. The lead character Vianne is a woman who literally follows the wind wherever it blows, bringing the gift of charm, cheek and chocolate to townspeople whether they like it or not. She is a perfect example of using the power of seduction to better the world, as well as what it looks like to reckon with the pain of not fitting-in when you shine your light without apology. Rock on V.

juliaCharlie Wilson’s War

Julia Roberts’ character in this movie is the epitome of a modern Femme Fatale. Powerful, outspoken and aware of the change she wishes to see in the world she packs all the ammunition in her arsenal, and uses her feminine wiles to bring everyone higher.

mary poppinsMary Poppins

Mary Poppins is a supreme seductress. She is magnetic, authoritative, and downright artistic in the delivery of charm. She is also not one to mess with. She demonstrates the seductive art of believing in your inherent rightness and seducing those around you to do the same, all the while making them think it was their idea to begin with.

maria The Sound Of Music

Julie Andrews’ character Maria Von Trapp is a shining example of pure Sacred Seduction in action. Whether it is cutting up her own curtains to sew clothes for the kids or snatching her family out of harms way at a moment’s notice, she unfailingly goes for what seduces her heart in every adventure. In doing so, she attracts a deep and authentic love with the Captain, unintentionally diverting and freeing the Baroness. Simply irresistible.

phryneMiss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries

Okay y’all. Ready the seduction bugle for the arrival of our Queen! There is literally no character in the history of all entertainment that I can point to more firmly as an example of living Sacred Seduction more than Miss Phryne Fisher. This boa-clad force of nature is a flirt, a temptress, a philanthropist, a protector, a detective, a harlequin and a real life woman all rolled into one. Watching Phryne in action literally gives me hope for the future of our world that the seductress archetype is still alive and kicking!

francescaUnder The Tuscan Sun

Ahhh, Francesca. In Under The Tuscan Sun, Diane Lane gives us an up close and personal look at what it means to ride the wild, crazy, organic, untamed horse called seduction all the way into the sunset. From the pits of her post-divorce despair, seduction gives her a come-hither look through the window of a Cortona real estate agency, then grabs her by the hair as she exclaims “STOP THE BUS!” A stunning example of all the guts and glory required to live a seductive life.


When this movie came out in 2002 I saw it in the tiny theater across from my workplace seven times in a row. Every night after my shift, even though it seemed crazy to keep going back over and over, I could not resist the raw, lush, supremely satisfying sensuality of this heroine’s journey. One thing Frida Kahlo knew was how to seduce as a  spiritual practice. Let us learn from her.

veronicaDangerous Beauty

Dangerous Beauty is a stunning and sensual movie about the life of legendary courtesan and poetess Veronica Franco. While the acting and screenplay are a wee bit cheesy, the plot is enchanting from moment #1.  You will be seduced by the story of what can happen when you listen to your inner seduction, for better or worse (but mostly better).


Not only is this a cheeky look and comical look at the history of  “female hysteria” during the Victorian Era, Maggie’s Gyllenhaal’s character Charlotte is the picture of seductive sovereignty in action. Spirited doesn’t even begin to describe her fiery personality. Like all great Sacred Seductresses she is an immediate turn-off to those who try to limit her, and an immediate turn on to those who see the brilliant sparkle of her unconventional and un-tameable light.

If this definition of the Seductive Way resonates with you, I also invite you to check out this three minute film, which takes you on a tour inside Deep Dive, my signature ten week program that closes for enrollment this Friday. This is the last course I will be teaching in 2015. If you are thinking about Deep Dive but feel on the fence, click here to contact us.  Personal connection is at the very heart of what we do and it would be our pleasure to talk to you one-on-one about your journey to seductive success.

Roll Tape,




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Let’s Talk, Just You and Me

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Dear Seduction Angel,

I am writing to you from the balcony of a grand mansion, surrounded by the balmy afternoon heat in New Orleans. Any minute now the participants of my annual seduction retreat will be arriving, and this my friends, is my Christmas.  When I was a kid I used to dream of a place where my fairy Godmother would hold court, and I could learn all the things a confident, sassy woman who wasn’t afraid to be sexy on her own terms, knew.  A finishing school with a feminist twist.

I am grateful that the labyrinth of my life has led me to create that place in my programs and retreats.  Go Team Fairy Godmother. :)

It is no coincidence that tonight as we raise our glasses in a welcome toast, the early sign-up bonus of a 30-minute coaching session will be closing on Deep Dive, my ten week signature program.The reason I chose coaching as the early sign up bonus is because living a seductive life is a personal, intimate journey. In one-on-one coaching we get to go deep into the areas of your life you wish to bring more seduction. We will talk about what unexpected things might be standing in the way of you living as a fully embodied seductress.  And finally, we will create a custom game plan for you to pour seduction over every area of your life, like you were pouring oils  into a bath of soothing, warm water.

But it doesn’t just stop there.

We then have ten full weeks together in Deep Dive where I will be keeping my eagle eye on you, tracking your progress and keeping you connected to your desires. After the course completes we stay in touch in the Deep Dive Alumni forum. Once I coach with a woman, I am invested in her journey forever.

The personal difference makes all the difference.

Click here to claim one of the last coaching spots.

I can’t wait to talk to you,

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When I Told My In-Laws “I’m A Burlesque Performer”

My sacred seduction journey began almost ten years ago the first time my foot hit the burlesque stage. Those of you who have read my story know that becoming a burlesque performer was a cathartic experience of enlightenment. It proved to me I didn’t have to change or mold myself into what anyone else (namely the patriarchy) wanted me to be in order to feel sexy, seductive and irresistible.

At first, being a burlesque performer felt like wearing a provocative set of lingerie under a stuffy business suit. It was a secret that only a select handful of friends knew about. But as it happens when you fall in love, my secret started to show. I would spend the whole day at my corporate job surfing the internet for burlesque history, pastie design tips, the best boas in the biz and how to perfectly peel off a stocking. At parties I began to be more open about my little secret and felt cooler than a glass of f*cking iced tea being able to say with honesty that I was legitimately a burlesque performer.

But despite my swelling pride I never thought I would be able to “come out” to people in my life like my family, my co-workers or my then in-laws. What on earth would they think of me? I envisioned a series of side-eyes happening at every wedding and barbecue from here to kingdom come. I’ll just go on being the family member who is suspiciously sexy and somewhat kooky-for-a-reason-you-can’t-pin-down, thank you very much. Until one fateful day, I was inviting friends and family to an event about living life to the fullest and not holding anything back. I thought to myself: “How can I honestly invite people to this event when it is not how I am living myself?” I found myself drafting a long letter, with pictures, about my journey to burlesque and what it had done for my life. I wrote 11 paragraphs about how liberating it was to say yes to this part of myself and not hold anything back.

I soon put this note up on Facebook to meet the eyes of my aunts and uncles, my ex-bosses, my high school crushes, and yes, my Mother In Law! It was frightening of course, but my fright was far outweighed by the freedom I felt at living with total authenticity. Not only did I not feel ashamed about it, I felt damn proud, and marched forward with a lightness in my step that I didn’t even know I had longed for my whole life. I received over 80 comments in 24 hours about how inspiring, brave and exciting my friends and family found my honesty to be. Some of them even wanted to come to my burlesque classes! After posting that note I felt more like a seductress than ever before in my life. The girdle of pretending was off, and I could finally take a deep breath.

Sacred Seduction is a lifestyle of attraction through authenticity.

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A woman in our community who is a MASSIVE example of this is Tina. She is a graduate of my signature program Deep Dive which just opened for enrollment, and I am so proud to share her story of incredible transformation:

Deep Dive was the best decision I could have made.   It was an initiation into the world of slowing down.  Each week, I started feeling more deeply into my essence.  Kitty has a magical way of transforming our minds into one of self acceptance and love of all of our qualities.   The live coaching calls with Kitty and the Deep Dive community were a way to connect and also realize that I was not alone.  In July, I gave my notice to the company I had worked at for 12 years.   I had to explain to everyone that I was quitting without another job but to follow my passion.   Every time I spoke those words, I felt more at home in my heart.  Since quitting, I’ve taken time off to travel to Italy, and every day, I feel like life is seducing me.   I think of Kitty and my fellow seductresses all the time and say a prayer of thanks.”


The members of Deep Dive don’t just speak their truth in the moment, they allow truth to permeate and shape every corner of their lives, like letting light into a dark room. Sound scary? Sure it does. But is it more or less scary than keeping  on a girdle that shifts your organs and steals your breath? Only you can answer that question, my darling.

Patiently awaiting your answer,





Burlesque photo: Beth Mayesh


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Tissue Box Syndrome (And It’s Cure)

Tissue Box Syndrome (And It's Cure)

Today I want to talk to you about something that is at the heart of seduction being a spiritual practice.  It’s called “Tissue Box Syndrome” and in my opinion, it is the number one killer of a woman’s confidence. Allow me to take you on a tour:

After a long day at work you decide you should go to the gym.  After your workout you feel glad you went, but in the back of your mind is a voice saying “yeah, you worked out, but you didn’t do any ab work”. On your way home you feel a little tight in your body and still stressed from your day at work, and wonder if maybe you should have gone to a yoga class instead. When you get home you decide to practice a little self care, so you pour a bath.  While in the bathtub, you decide to watch something on Periscope.  The whole time you feel good that you are taking a bath but think you should probably be reading a book or meditating to relax and work on being more present. Before bed, you decide you should clean up the kitchen so you can rest easy knowing your work for the day is done. But as your head hits the pillow, you wonder if maybe you should have gone straight to bed because now it’s so late. Or, if you did to go straight to bed, you think about how maybe you should have cleaned up the kitchen…

OH MY GOOD LORD.  It’s exhausting even to read, isn’t it?

Tissue Box Syndrome is when you are striving to do the right things in life, not just in your big achievements but in the little things like self-care. However, you find that once you get that one thing done, another thing pops up that you could do in addition, or that you should have done differently, like tissues popping up one after the other out of a box.

I remember one particular Tissue Box moment years ago when I was trying to decide what to have for dinner. “Salmon with orzo or veggie pizza?” was a thought I had turned over in my head a hundred times that day, like a hamburger that just wouldn’t cook. It wasn’t the calories I was worried about, I had kissed my inner-perfect-eater goodbye long ago. What I was obsessing over in that moment was what my intuition was telling me to eat.  I couldn’t get a read on my inner pilot light and was freaking out about not being able to listen within. In that moment had a stunning realization: whether I was stressing about calories or stressing about listening within, I was still STRESSING. THE EFF. OUT.

The tricky thing about this syndrome is that it doesn’t just effect what we have for dinner or what we do before bed.  This cannibalistic consciousness embeds itself insidiously into every area of life, diminishing our sense of confidence and power, and needlessly taking up acres of precious psychic space. When it comes to winning this race you might think that working harder and becoming more agile will put you ahead, but here’s the deal my darling: it’s impossible to win a race when the finish line is constantly moving.  In order to win, and I mean truly win, you’ve got to take yourself out of the game altogether.

A beacon of a woman who has made this transformation is Liv. Liv is a graduate of my signature program Deep Dive, which has just opened for enrollment. Liv has experienced massive change from making this simple shift, and she generously offered to share her story:



“Before Deep Dive I was the girl who could make anything into a guilt fest. Guilt was my best friend and also my worst enemy. My day revolved around thoughts like, “why did you eat so much? You could be a better mother. You need to pay more attention to your husband.” Kitty transformed this for me. Deep Dive has created one of the deepest healings in my life. It taught me that rather than face my guilt and shame with positive thoughts and affirmations, I literally had to just step out of the war. I stepped out and started living. This program will teach you to peel back the layers to get to that jewel of authenticity that lives inside. This program will give you an amazing community for when you feel like you can’t make the last mile. This program is a life saver and I would recommend it to anyone who wants to step out of the battle within. Kitty has the guts and the determination to help you drop the load you are carrying. Do it.”


I am deeply honored and grateful to Liv for this glowing testimonial, but even more than her words I am awed by the way I see her living her life, free from the voice of “should” and flying on the wings of Power, Pleasure and Purpose, the three pillars of a Seductive Life.

Deep Dive is the last program I will be teaching in 2015 and I would love to count you as one of my mermaids this year.  Click here to watch the trailer and learn more.

Love, Love & More Love Still,





Photo by: Sonja Lekovic


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“Excuse Me, Do You Own A Fainting Couch?”

Excuse me, do you own a fainting couch?


Last night I went out for cocktails with a dear friend. We were sitting at a sexy bar smiling, happy, and cozy.  Then, a flock of men came over to us and offered to buy us a few drinks.  After some casual conversation we returned to our little lady nest.  One of the men then came over and said to me, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but do you own a chaise lounge?”

I threw my head back laughing.  “Actually the punctuating line of my bio is ‘eternally on the hunt for the perfect velvet fainting couch’.  Why do you ask?” I replied. He said I just looked like the type. When I pressed him a bit further, he said that I look like a woman who is very confident and comfortable in her own skin.

And the fact that my self love was so palpable that it conjured the image of a fainting couch to a near stranger was probably one of the best compliments I’ve ever received.

They say that those who can’t do, teach.  It’s true, being confident and comfortable in my own skin is not something that has come easily for me.  I have walked over the hot coals of my greatest fears in search of my truth: the truth that I am a radiant, delicious, powerful force of nature, that my light is a gift to this world and I won’t let anything stand in it’s way, even if it is my own self. And it is my core belief that this is not just my truth, but the truth of every woman on this planet.

Because I have walked this labyrinth so fully and completely, and continue to do so each day, that is how I can teach others how to do it too.  There are hundreds of tools that I share in my courses for remembering this truth about ourselves.  I have hand selected five of them to share in this fun, free game called Start The Season With Seduction.  I invite you to be my guest and with this change of season, turn over a new leaf, one of sensuality, beauty, confidence, pleasure and purpose.  And fainting couches.  Always fainting couches.


PS – Games are always more fun with girlfriends! Click here to invite your tribe on Facebook, Twitter and Pintrest!


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The 5 Things I Was Sent To Earth To Tell You

Truth or Dare? Join me in this 5-day free game to Start The Season With Seduction

My loves,

One of the questions I am most often asked is “Kitty, how did you find your purpose?” Purpose is a funny thing. If we have found our purpose it appears that we’ve arrived at some sort of spiritual space station, finally ready to dock into certainty and claim our new discovery.  If we feel we haven’t fully realized our purpose yet, it’s like we are floating in orbit, perpetually waiting to pick up on a tailwind from our north star.

For the last six years I have been teaching, writing, living and breathing seduction as a spiritual practice.  It’s an unconventional career path to say the least. But I’m going to let you in on a little secret: Sacred Seduction is not my life purpose. Not really.

My real life purpose is to shine my light as bright as I can.  It’s quite simple really.  When I walk into a hotel bar feeling fierce and frisky and ready to flirt, I am shining my light.  When I deliver a hot meal to a near stranger while volunteering for Meals On Wheels, I am shining my light.  When I am with a dear friend or a client and I decide to see their flaws as part of their utter perfection, especially when they can’t see it themselves, I am shining my light.

I believe that being conscious of how we are in the world is just as important as the the things we do. And that is the true mission of Sacred Seduction: to provide tools, practices and community that teaches people to shine their light, and in doing so, collectively we create a brighter world.

That’s why I’ve created a fun, free, 5-day game to Start The Season With Seduction.  Each day I will send you a video, sharing my top secret tools to feel confident in your own skin, be irresistibly magnetic, and to rock your life like the legendary seductress you already are!

Enter your name and email to claim your spot:

Your first video will arrive on Thursday, September 17th. I can’t wait to get started!

PS – Games are always more fun with girlfriends! Click here to invite your tribe on Facebook, Twitter and Pintrest!


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My Cousin, The Seductress

My younger cousin and I have been tight since the day she was born.  We’ve been having “girl talk” since she was 9 and I was 17.  We’d sneak away from the Thanksgiving dinner table and whisper secrets about the boys we had crushes on  in our respective classes.

Even though we are now all grown up, the girl talk continues.  My little millennial  cuz usually prefers text, so recently when I saw her name pop up on my caller ID a few weeks ago, I picked up right away.  “Oh my, thank God you picked up, I need you!” she said.  There was merriment (and maybe a little vodka) in her voice so I knew she was ok, and that this was more a cousin to cousin 911 than an actual 911 situation. “Oh my God, tell me everything” I replied.

She was on summer vacation with family and one night felt bored out of her mind.  So while she was out at dinner with her family, she excused herself to go explore the city.  While she was out strolling, she met a friendly gentleman who invited her to join him at the bar down the street.  My cousin has a boyfriend and made a clear boundary that she was just looking for someone to hang out with, but still she felt leery. Hence, why she called me.

Now, you might be thinking “good luck with that sister” as in, what guy would take the boyfriend story seriously when a girl agrees to meet a stranger out at a bar in a beach town? My cousin and I were wondering the same thing as she fidgeted with nerves while talking to me on the phone. “Look, you know your boundaries, you’re having an adventure, you’re meeting out in public, you’re a sacred seductress, so Y.O.L.O., LITERALLY!”

“OK, I can do this!” she said and marched out into the night, bouncing like a boxer about to enter the ring. I made her promise to keep me posted every 15 minutes with texts (and if there had been a live video feed I would have asked for that too).  Within ten minutes, my cousin, a self-identified extreme introvert, was up onstage belting out karaoke for the the first time in her life, with her new friend by her side.

She had a wonderful time, and I couldn’t have been more proud.  Here was my little cuz, bored.  She didn’t have any friends nearby, so she took the sacred seductress route – which is to make one.  She was clear on her boundaries and her new friend respected them completely. This night is one she will never forget. She woke up the next morning high on the her own bravery, knowing that she is the type of  woman who follows her inner muse.  And that one thing she certainly is not…is bored.

Proud Mary Keep On Burnin’,
k swirl signature





PS – My cousin is one of my most loyal students.  She has done several of my programs, including my ten-week intensive Deep Dive which opens for Fall enrollment on September 22nd. If her story inspires you, enter your name and email below to get exclusive bonuses and the VIP early invite, only for list members!



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A New Paradigm for Toughing It Out

A New Paradigm For Toughing It Out

There’s really no way to give a smooth interlude to this: lately I’ve really upped my game in the department of self pleasuring. There is a ritual that I do everyday, similar to my N.B.W.R. ritual, that includes self-sex. I use that term “self sex” very intentionally because of reading this quote from Betty Dodson’s book, Sex for One:

“Masturbation is a primary form of sexual expression. It’s not just for kids or for those in-between lovers or for old people who end up alone. Masturbation is the ongoing love affair that each of us has with ourselves throughout our lifetime.”

The purpose of this ritual is not to experience a climax. It is done with the intention of getting to know my body more intimately than ever before. When I do this ritual there is always a point when I want to give up. The sensation becomes too intense, and I think I’ve had enough and gone as far as I can go. At that point, I always try to push myself just a little bit further. I ask myself, “how much more can I receive? Can I experience more pleasure than I think I have the capacity for? Can I go even further than I did the last time? And next time, even further than that?”

Fast forward to two days later where I am on the elliptical at the gym. Now, when it comes to working out, I am not a no pain-no gain kind of girl. I am a no pain period kind of girl. But as I was working out and I reached that threshold where my body was telling me I had had enough, I remembered my experience while self pleasuring. Can I experience more pleasure, even while here on the elliptical? Can I give into that feeling of intensity rather than resist it and let it take me on a ride?

Well I did. I pushed myself a little farther for a little longer, and I felt AMAZING. It made me wonder: all the times we feel like we have to “tough it out”; what if it’s not about enduring pain, but it’s actually about receiving pleasure? (click to tweet!) When I reached my true limit while working out, I felt the ecstatic pleasure of intense exhilaration. My muscles burned and my heart pounded. My whole body was covered with sweat. Not just the sweat of working out, but the sweat of a woman who just went for more than she thought she could handle.

Sounds a lot like having an orgasm, don’t you think?

Huffing and Puffing,
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The Difference Between A Fling And A Love Affair

The Difference Between A Fling And A Love Affair

Recently one of my students asked the question: “As a Sacred Seductress, what is the difference between having a fling and having a love affair?” As a purveyor of both, allow me to clarify.

A fling is brief. Heated. A flash in the pan. One fella from this winter comes to mind that we’ll call “the trumpet player”.  We had instant chemistry when we met. Our first kiss happened over a rich red wine. He was finishing a sentence, about to stand up to go visit the restroom.  This shift had brought our bodies closer together and I could tell he wanted to kiss me.  Because of his nerves or playing it cool I could also tell he wasn’t going to.

So in true seductress fashion I grabbed his shirt with my fists when he least expected it and pulled him in close. (He got the hint.)  Later that night a group of girls told us they chose that restaurant because they saw us in the window, and figured it was good luck to eat at a place where two people were so clearly in love.  They did not realize that we were only two hours into our first date.

Flings are full of memorable, heated moments like that. With the trumpet player it happened quick, it ended quick.  It was like jumping one flip on a trampoline in slow motion. I will always have a fondness for my flings in spite of, or perhaps because of the fact that we never get in too deep.

A love affair on the other hand, is quite different.

A love affair is where we consciously decide to love someone for however long we have them, knowing that due to nature or nurture, we probably will not have them indefinitely. Some love affairs last a weekend.  Some go on for lifetimes.

I once dated a man where the bud of our romance had turned to a full blossom.  He lived in another city and wanted partnership.  I knew in my heart this wouldn’t work. “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”, he once said. Au contraire, mon ami.

I’ll have my cake, eat it, lick the plate, and have the whole thing photographed.

I don’t mean that as a “fuck you”. What I’m really saying is: my soul is going to love you for as long as it has you, whether you want it to or not.

It takes great vulnerability and a very brave heart to embark on a true love affair. You never know what will happen as a result. Many of my greatest lovers have become my dearest friends. Those relationships have a special, sacred kind of intimacy like none other I have known.  And despite the heartache it often takes to get to that kind of love, if I had the chance to do it again, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Flings stay in our consciousness for as long as memory can retrieve them.  But the thumbprints, beauty marks and branding that love affairs bring – those grooves are permanent. Like a sleeve of tattoos, they only prove how bad-ass you are in the end.

Ink Me Baby,
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Photo Source: Cuded

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