A Refreshing Way To Open Your Heart

 

Have you even noticed that when you are in the hair stylist’s chair, your lips tend to loosen and secrets tend to spill? Ever wonder what’s up with that?
 
Well I can tell you. Quite scientifically in fact.
 
First of all, it’s an act of intimacy just to allow someone to touch your head. You have put your trust in them by allowing them re-style the way you look. You are surrounded by glorious smells, sweet scalp massage, and the spotlight of one person’s complete attention for at least 45 minutes.
 
In this setting, your nervous system relaxes. Therefore, your heart opens. And when your heart opens, you can’t help but speak from a place of authenticity.
 
The number one need that must be met for your nervous system to thrive is a feeling of safety, but here’s the thing: what creates a feeling of safety is different for every person in every experience.
 
For example, one of my core spiritual practices is Body Worship – a ritual of looking at your naked body in the mirror through the eyes of appreciation. I had done this exercise several times and my attempts were earnest, but they were usually done in the reflection of a bathroom mirror under overhead lighting with no seduction of the senses whatsoever.
 
When I really came around to it was when I lit multiple candles, set out a soft, fuzzy blanket, warmed coconut oil on the stove, set up a gorgeous antique mirror to gaze into, and played Cleopatra inspired music.
 
Because I had tended to my body’s need for beauty, music, luxury and pleasure, my nervous system felt safe enough to soften. I let down my guard, and it was a rapturous, life-changing experience.
 
Do you tense up every time someone tells you to “just relax”?
 
Are you sick of people telling you to “just open your heart”, like it’s a latch you can unhook at any given moment?
 
Do you yearn for someone who understands the needs of your mind AND your body when it comes to your healing and growth?
 
Well my dear, your chariot awaits. Club Macaron was created exactly for YOU.

You who wants a way to bring more softness and relaxation into her life, but prefers the sound of a New Orleans jazz trumpet to that of a singing bowl.
 
You who finds holiness in a gorgeous vintage cocktail ring.
 
You who suspects that the art of everyday pleasure can be equally if not more healing than analyzing your pain.

Right now you can join Club Macaron for only $47/month.

When you enroll you receive:

  • Weekly charm school lessons that explore healing through the arts of sensuality, spirituality and style
  • Live, playful meditations to soothe your feminine nervous system every week
 

  • A print copy of Club Macaron book (filled with inspiring journaling prompts, powerful stories and choose-your-own-adventure style assignments, all in full, glorious color) delivered right to your doorstep

  • A live monthly “Date Night” with Kitty and the Club Macaron community

  • Content that speaks to the needs of your nervous system with themes like: simplifying luxury, beauty as prayer, how to tell the truth with confidence, the art of savoring, flirtation mastery, style as a spiritual practice, and more.


Enrollment closes Thursday night. Click here to join us now!

A God You Can See & Touch

A God You Can See & Touch

Butter Beans,

Recently I was listening to a woman speak on spirituality, and she shared a beautiful story about how several years ago her house had burned to the ground.  “It was a devastating loss,” she said “and yet it was the greatest blessing, because it brought me out into the country, where I found a God that I could see and touch.”

My ears perked like a wolf.

As a lifelong seeker, I seem to always be doing  just that. Seeking.

Why do I go to dance and yoga classes? Seeking to feel the divine in my bones.

Why do I abstain from addictive patterns? Seeking to make space for the divine in my life.

Why do I hike and pray and meditate? Seeking to hear the voice of the divine in my thoughts.

Of course, the reason I do all this seeking is because it often feels joyous.

But there are also times where it feels utterly LABORIOUS.

So when this woman said that she found a way to see, taste, feel and touch God, I drew in closer to take notes on where to find the shortcut.

“By moving to the country I took up a hiking meditation, and started to notice the miracle of an acorn becoming a tree, and the fact that every single day, the sun rises and sets without me having to do ANYTHING to make it happen.”

My gaze drifted outside the window to the trees which were bare from the freeze of winter, naked without noticing, like Adam and Eve.

I looked at the muddy grass which, currently  brown and showing no signs of life, was quietly hibernating like a sleeping bear under the frozen ground, gathering and containing it’s energy for the roar of spring.

I looked up to the moisture in the sky we call clouds, always changing, always moving, just like the moisture inside my very own cells.

I know that finding God/Goddess/The Divine in nature is not news.

But there was something about that particular moment where it occurred to me that any time I’m feeling alone, anytime my seeking feels like it’s going nowhere, anytime I feel like the voice of God can’t be heard, or the presence of God can’t be felt, all I need to do is look out the window.

AND IT’S ALL.

RIGHT.

THERE.

Tangible. Physical. Alive.

Thank the sweet baby Venus.

All my love,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

 

 

 

 

Image via Everyday Parisian

An Investment Guaranteed To Payoff

An Investment With Guaranteed Payoff

Get that money, girl

Beloveds,

When it comes to resources, there are three that top the list:

1. Money

2. Time

3. Energy

The thing is, when it comes to efficiency, these are listed and treated in a backwards order.

We usually put all of our attention on growing and squandering the first two, when what we are really after the whole time is #3.

Have you ever watched a three year old in action and thought “God, if I had that much energy, I’d get so much done!”

Children have a limitless amount of energy to support their growth. When we become adults, it’s not so much that our energy drains.

It is that we are taught faulty investment strategies when it comes to the use of this resources.

Examples of these faulty investment strategies:

– Fake smiles

– Sitting all day

– Putting the need for production ahead of the need for pleasure and fun

If we were in school for investing, this strategy would be considered a lesson in TOTAL LOSS.

I got rear ended recently, and the insurance company called my case a total loss, meaning the value of the car did not exceed the amount it would cost to perform the repairs.

I wonder what would happen if just for one day, you prioritized investing in your energy first and foremost?

What would give you the biggest ROI’s at the end of the day?

What would change in your routine if your intention was not producing and earning as much as you can, but protecting and nurturing the energy that allows you to produce and earn in the first place?

What if instead of milking your energy reserves until the teats run dry, or falsely stimulating milk (energy) production with hormones and synthetics, you simply gave your body the time and space to create more milk? Even if that is only  a few deep breaths, right….now?

This is definitely one gamble worth taking.

Moo,

 KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

Feel Everything

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Dear Ones,

I know that for you, self-love is more than just personal.

It is more than manicures and marshmallows.

Self love is an act of rebellion, and a form of resistance.

That is why I want to share with you one very simple, easy way you can change the world, right now.

Ready?

The action is: be in your body.

That’s it.

Whatever is happening in this moment, just be there in the body that is yours.

Right now.

Why, and how does this change the world?

Being in the body requires that we feel.

Feeling causes empathy.

Empathy causes us to care for each other.

Can you imagine if all world leaders were given rigorous, relentless training on how to take The Sacred Pause before making any big decisions?

It would be a much kinder, caring world indeed.

I want that world to be our reality.

That is why every one of my programs follows a different path, but each leads right back to the same sacred and holy place: Your Body.

A woman who understands the importance and the power of embodiment is House of Loveness founder, Betsy Blankenbaker.

In her book Autobiography of an Orgasm (called “the anti-Fifty Shades of Grey” by the U.K.’s Sunday Times) Betsy’s writes in candid detail about studying sensuality to heal her body and mind from sexual assaults.

Without the journey to back to the body, Betsy would not be the world changing truth teller she is today.

This is why every purchase from the Flash Sale Fundraiser comes with a bonus gift of Betsy’s book, as well as a copy of my own, so that on the journey of coming how to your body, you are supported every step of the way.

Betsy and I would be so proud to be on your team.

There are only a few hours left to save, and 20% of all purchases go straight to House of Loveness.

Here’s to feeling more, settling less, and making this world a more peaceful and pleasurable place for all.

shop flash sale button

Community: It’s Not Just The People You Like (It’s More)

community quote

Snow Angels,

When it comes to community, I used to thing that word meant a big gang of friends to have impromptu Friday night pot lucks with. That’s part of it, but more and more I’m learning that community simply means: the person standing next to me.

A place that has taught me so much about community is my local yoga studio, Asheville Community Yoga. They are a world class studio that is completely non-profit. They believe yoga should be for available everyone, whether you can afford it or not. If you can’t give back with money you can give back with time. Everyone comes together to keep this place not only running but flourishing. It inspires me so.

In this age which allows us to keep in close touch with friends all over the world, I find it’s easy to feel like I have a million friends, but not a strong sense of “community.” I’m committed to changing that in 2018.

I’m daring myself to have a party for all my neighbors I haven’t met yet. I’m volunteering for the Carolina Abortion Fund. I’m going to host Friday pot lucks (rather than just wish for them), and encourage every friend to bring a new friend we don’t already know.

In 2018 I’m committed to investing in my community members, whether I know them or not, whether I like them or not. (P.S. – usually I find that if I don’t like them, it’s most likely because I haven’t taken the time to know them yet.)

As Glennon Doyle says, “We belong to each other.”

Do you too find that in this digital age you long for a sense of community? What are you doing to change that this year?

I would love to hear from you here.

See you at the potluck,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

 

What REALLY happens before a big launch

Pomegranate Seeds,

They say that when you do something over and over, it gets easier every time. I find this to be true, but this past Wednesday when I delivered my story hour called “I’m Going To Be Completely Honest With You”, the lead up was far from easy.

I am extremely comfortable in the role of teacher, but this presentation was different than just teaching. This was a full-hour of truth telling.

I would like to tell you that the night before I drank a soothing cup of tea, watched an episode of Miss Fisher, and got to bed early so I could wake up refreshed. But the truth was, at 11pm I was still up and wired, still rehearsing, and still working to make all the details “perfect.” (#virgo)

While sitting at the dining room table, my eyes wandered to a box of supplies for a halloween themed gingerbread house, which I had bought for my Mom and I to do as a craft while she was visiting.

A minute later the windows of that gingerbread house had found their way down my gullet. I sarcastically sent this picture to some close friends who had been supporting me in my preparations with the caption:

“YOUR FEARLESS LEADER.”

Photo on 9-12-17 at 11.27 PM

Those who watched the story hour probably had no idea I had been anxious, because in the moment I delivered it, I felt surrendered and calm.

This was partly due to my high level of preparation, but mostly it was because of my practice of Vérité.

What is Vérité? It is the french word for truth, but it is also a state of being.

Vérité is what happens when we slow down to connect to the present moment, engage with what’s real, and simply show up in life as exactly who we are.

For 90 minutes before the class I put down my notes, settled into prayer, and asked the divine to speak through me. I meditated to clear my mind, danced to connect to my body, and set the intention I may contribute to others finding their Vérité, rather than try to control the outcome.

The result was that I felt calm, connected and open. I had a freakin’ blast with you all! (p.s. the playback is available for a limited time – click here to check it out.)

In writing this to you, my intention is the same: to model Vérité by showing you that the freaked-out, 11pm gingerbread thief can exist right alongside the calm, cool, collected presenter. That the two are not mutually exclusive, and that one does not invalidate the other.

That is why The Vérité Community exists, to give women a place to slow down, drop the mask, get real, and connect to the place where all your power lives, which is in the present moment.

In Vérité we come together as a community to explore ancient practices like meditation, movement and mindulness, with a sensual, playful feminine twist.

When we slow down to connect to what’s real, we cannot help but show up more authentically in our lives.

If intimacy, connection, presence and authenticity are values that you cherish and protect, there is a place waiting for you in this community.

This is the most comprehensive program I have ever offered, and it is also the most affordable program I have ever offered. 

Enrollment is only open for a limited time.

Click here to join us, and become a member now.

With sweet gingerbread breath, 

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

FREE Q & A ON SLOWING DOWN

Treasures,

Do you ever wish you could slow things down, but despite your best efforts, can’t ever seem to make it happen?

When it comes to slowing down, it’s not that we don’t know how to do it. If anything, we know way too much.

We know very well how to draw a bubble bath, how to make a fragrant cup of tea, how to sit outside in the sunshine.

Slowing down is not the problem.

The problem is that when we do it, we have to face the whiplash that comes from going 80 mph to going 10 mph, and all the things that come up as a result. For example:

  • Sitting in the bathtub for half an hour may sound relaxing, but it also means having to listen to your racing thoughts. Alongside that comes acknowledging that as hard as you try, you just can’t seem to quiet your mind and seem to slow them down. And that frustrates you.
  • Sitting outside in the sunshine sounds good, but it would mean pressing pause on your kids, your parents, your spouse and/or your work. Not only would those things crumble without your care, secretly, you would crumble if for one second you thought they didn’t need you to survive. Catering to their every need makes you feel powerful. Depleted, burnt out and resentful, yes. But powerful.
  • Making a cup tea sounds nice, but it means that you would probably have to pay attention to that nagging feeling in your gut telling you that something doesn’t feel quite right in your relationship, or your job, or some other aspect of your life, and since you don’t know how to fix it, you just don’t want to face it.

So we stay busy, we keep working, we keep serving; all the time wondering when we are going to finally be able to relax, savor, and enjoy life. But as you can see.

To slow down in life, it’s not more TIME we need, it’s more COURAGE.

Courage to listen to what the racing thoughts, feeling in your gut, and the need to people please are really trying to say.

It’s listening to and acting upon those messages that truly cuts your energy and your power loose. (The bubble baths are really just the icing on the cake.)

On Thursday, April 13th I am hosting a free, live-video Q & A call to address your personal blocks on slowing down. 

In this hour we are going get to the root what keeps you from slowing down, address the areas where energy is leaking from your life, and take your power BACK.

You can even submit your questions anonymously and I will answer them live on the call.

 SIGN UP FOR THE FREE CALL HERE:

Also,  parties are always more fun when you invite your GIRLFRIENDS!

To share this powerful class with your tribe, just copy/paste the link www.kittycavalier.com/freecall, or click here to share on Facebook.

See you on the 13th!

 

Where Do I Even Start? (Creativity Overwhelm)

CREATIVITY OVERWHELM


Do you ever feel so overwhelmed by your wild, creative dreams that you don’t even know where to start?

Being the first week of Spring, this question is particularly auspicious.

To know where to begin, we first have to understand the fundamental differences between creation and production.

Production means “to bring forth.”

An example of production would be to take the pieces of a refrigerator out of a box, follow a manual, and assemble or “bring forth” said refrigerator.

Creation on the other hand, is different.

Creation means “to form out of nothing.”

In contrast, creation would not be the assembly of a refrigerator, it would be inventing refrigeration.

A much different game indeed.

Creation doesn’t tell us when we’ll finish, or where.

Creation doesn’t tell us what it will look like in the end, or if we will even arrive at an end at all.

To get in on the game of creation, we have to stop playing by production’s rules. (click to tweet!)

For example, when a woman is pregnant, she doesn’t say to her friends “I’m sorry, I can’t go to the movies tonight, I have to go home and make my baby’s toenails.”

She’s not assembling the baby inside of her. She’s CREATING it.

With every throb of her heart and every breath of her lungs, she lives the steady mantra of “grow, grow, grow.”

And so it is with every other thing we are “forming out of nothing.” Careers, relationships, art, life. We breathe, we pray, we grow…grow…grow.

Years ago I asked my friend Rochelle Schieck, creator of Qoya, how she took the seed of an idea for a new kind of movement class, and nurtured it into full blown tree that now shelters and feeds thousands of women on the journey back to their bodies.

“Just start” she replied.

Just start.

As in, rather than focusing on what will get you to your destination the fastest, just start walking.

Or rather than focusing on what the title of your book should be, just start writing it.

JUST. START.

When I first started my business I taught seduction classes under fluorescent lighting out of dance studios that smelled like gym socks. (I did my best with my candles and rose petals, but come on.)

My dream was to someday be teaching my classes inside a 17th century Tuscan villa. Today that dream is my reality.

I had no idea how that dream was going to happen. The only thing I knew for sure was that it was NEVER going to happen unless I was willing to just start.

So today, in honor of the little seeds that are courageously splitting wide open under the dark, frozen soil with absolutely no idea where they will end up, may we all be so brave. May we all “just start.”

SPOTLIGHT OVER TO YOU:

In what areas of your life are you currently leaping with no guarantee of a net, but a deep trust that if you just start, your actions will weave the net for you? I’d love to hear about them in the comments.

I love you snowdrop,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)

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Sex With A Salmon

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Tonight, I had sex with a salmon.

I let it enter me, tease me, and seduce me all the way to the center of my guts.

I’m talking about my dinner of course.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the topic of entering, penetration, communion. 

Sometimes when I eat dinner I look mindlessly at my phone.  But when I think about it, if I was in bed being penetrated by a lover, I would never be checking social media.

So why should it be any different with my dinner?

I owe it to this salmon to wrap my lips around it. 

To open WIDE.

To let the oxygen fill my mouth, making this a glorious threesome.

To feel the reciprocity between my taste buds leaning forward, and the salmon diving headfirst towards my tongue, offering me ecstasy in the flesh, even in it’s death.

It reminds me of when I made my first communion.  I went to church for 10 days in a row just to feel the unity of my budding senses with my roaring spirit…over….and over…and over again.

I give myself to this penetration of flavor as deeply as it gives itself to me.

And in doing so, I am reminded of the reason we call it “saying grace.”

Image: Vera Lair via Stocksy

Big Canvas, Baby Strokes

Snowballs,

I have a desire to tell you about.

It’s strong, potent, and lifelong.

I desire to buy a chateau in Southern France and outfit it to become “The Seduction House”, a divine shelter for seductresses like you and me to be in our natural habitat. Imagine with me…

“Sleeping in a cozy, antique four-poster bed under fresh, white, luxury linens as the morning sun streams in through your windows, and a lavender breeze tickles you awake. You drape a dressing gown over your shoulders and pad down to the formal dining room. Under grand, rustic chandeliers you dine among some of the most passionate, creative, interesting, openhearted women you will ever meet.
 
During the day we have charm school lessons in the parlor where guest teachers come from all around the world to reveal their secrets of living a seductive, sensual, pleasure-based life.  In the late afternoon we ride bikes down to the sparkling sea and swim naked in that same water that inspired the art of Picasso, Monet and Van Gogh.
 
In the evening we are entertained by artists, singers, dancers, fire performers and burlesque queens in the basement that has been renovated into a grand theater.  And at night, we merrily gather around the huge living room fireplace in fluffy robes to close out the day with a fragrant cup of tea and a smooth nightcap.”

I so look forward to the day our first guests pull into the gravel driveway lined with topiaries, their eyes widening with delight.

But that day is not today my loves. In fact, today just happens to be one of those days where I feel like The Anti-Seduction. And the only thing worse than feeling like The Anti-Seduction is knowing you have all the tools to get back to  your right mind, but absolutely no motivation to use them.

When our desires feel as far off and uncertain as The New World to an early explorer, how do we keep the wind in our sails?

 

Four Words: Big Canvas, Baby Strokes.

When I was a kid I was obsessed with the Pointillism. Pointillism is a technique of painting in which small, distinct dots of color are applied in patterns to form an image.

In the quest to create The Seduction House, it feels like I want to make big, broad strokes and go much faster than what my current expertise and resources are ready for.

But the true seduction of a deeply held desire is much more subtle; it is a long game, made of several small strokes all put together.

Think of all the the footsteps that go into running a marathon, or all the touch strokes that lead to a mind-bending orgasm.  One big move won’t get you hardly anywhere, but savoring every step and feeling every stroke most certainly will.

What coins are you throwing in the fountain of your desires these days my loves? I always love to hear from you in the comments.  And, if you know any French real estate agents….{wink}

 

Je T’aime,

KITTY_CAVALIER_ICON(1)